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Blues Attorney

Slang for very wealthy guitar hobbyists that buy extremely expensive guitars and gear despite not knowing how to actually play nor do they perform gigs.

Your average blues attorney plays stereotypical blues licks off time and out of key while behaving like a famous rockstar.

A blues attorney in a guitar shop will bring in their overpriced equipment under the guise of selling it just to get a reaction out of onlookers and staff. All the whole loudly proclaiming all the connections they have in the music business.

Blues attorneys personality wise are cripplingly insecure so naturally they need constant attention and external validation. This comes in the form of doing whatever it takes to draw attention to themselves; being as loud as possible about their connections, gear and concert stories. However, these people do not remotely have the skill set to back up their attitude and have basically become the greatvalu™️ version of the rockstar they identify themselves with. Outside of said rockstar they’re emulating, they have no real personality or identity, nor do they have anything original to bring to the table

Blues attorneys are emotionally fragile children in adults bodies that participate in energy vampirism. Everyone in their path is left emotionally drained and feeling like they just got slimed by something you’d see in ghostbusters.

Blues attorneys can come in all shapes and sizes and genres but the blues classification in particular tends to be a boomer
“Ugh not this guy again. That’s the 3rd time this week he’s been here”

“Oh yeah he’s a blues attorney. Just don’t give him any attention or emotional reaction and he will go away.”
Blues Attorney by Thismo2talcoil December 21, 2022
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