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depressèd Aß bītch 

Maria is depressed.
Maria is a depressèd Aß bītch.
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aßhole depressèd Aß bītch qwertyuiopasdfghjklzxcvbnmqazwsxedcrfvtgbyhnujmikolplmoknijbuhvygctfxrdzeswaqœ∑´®†¥¨ˆøπåß∂ƒ©˙∆˚¬Ω≈ç√∫˜µœåΩ∑ß≈´∂箃√†©∫¥˙˜¨∆µˆ˚ø¬ππ¬µø˚˜ˆ∆∫¨˙√¥©ç†ƒ≈®∂Ω´ß∑åœ `¡™£¢∞§¶•ªº–≠œ∑´®†¥¨ˆøπ“‘«åß∂ƒ©˙∆˚¬…æω≈ç√∫˜µ≤≥÷` € fifl‡°·‚—±œ„´‰ˇá¨ˆø∏”’»åíîï˝óôòúæ¸˛ç◊ı˜â¯˘¿ `¡™£¢∞§¶•ªº–≠œ∑´®†¥¨ˆøπ“‘«åß∂ƒ©˙∆˚¬…æΩ≈ç√∫˜µ≤≥÷` € fifl‡°·‚—±Œ„´‰ˇÁ¨ˆØ∏”’»»ÅÍÎÏ˝ÓÔÒÚÆ¸˛Ç◊ı˜Â¯˘¿`1234567890-=qwertyuiop[]asdfghjkl;'zxcvbnm,./~!@#$%^&*()_+QWERTYUIOP{}|ASDFGHJKL:"ZXCVBNM<>? `¡™£¢∞§¶•ªº–≠œ∑´®†¨ˆøπ“‘«åß∂ƒ©˙∆˚¬…æΩ≈ç√∫˜µ≤≥÷`1234567890-=~!@#$%^&*()_+qwertyuiop[]\QWERTYIP{}asdfghkl;’ASDFGHJKL:”zxcvbnm,./ZXCVBNM<>? 1234567890-=qwertyuiop[]\asdfghjkl;'zxcvbnm,./!@#$%ˆ&*()_+QWERTYUIOP{}|ASDFGHJKL:"ZXCVBNM<>?````¡™£¢∞§¶•ªº–≠œ∑´®†¥¨ˆøπ“‘«åß∂ƒ©˙∆˚¬…æΩ≈ç√∫˜µ≤≥÷` € fifl‡°·‚—±Œ„´‰ˇÁ¨ˆØ∏”’»ÅÍÎÏ˝ÓÔÒÚÆ¸˛Ç◊ı˜Â¯˘¿ `1234567890--=qwertyuiop[]\\asdfghjkl;'zxcvbnm,./~!@#$%^&*()_+QWERTYUIOP{}|ASDFGHJKL:"ZXCVBNM<>?`¡™£¢∞§¶•ªº–≠œ∑´®†¥¨ˆøπ“‘«åß∂ƒ©˙∆˚¬…æΩ≈ç√∫˜µ≤≥÷` € ‚—fl‡·‚—±Œ„´‰ˇÁ¨ˆØ∏”’»ÅÍÎÏ˝ÓÔÒÆ¸˛Ç◊ı˜Â¯˘¿ `1234567890-=qwertyuiop[]\adfghjkl;'zxcvbnm,./~!@#$%^&*()_+QWERTYUIOP{}|ASDFGHJKL:"ZXCVBNM<>?`¡™£¢∞§¶•ªº–≠œ∑´®†¥¨ˆøπ“‘«åß∂ƒ©˙∆˚¬…æΩ≈ç√∫˜µ≤≥÷` € fifl‡°·‚—±Œ„´‰ˇÁ¨ˆØ∏”’»ÅÍÎÏ˝ÓÔÒÚÆ¸˛Ç◊ı˜Â¯˘¿ `1234567890-=qwertyuiop[]\asdfghjkl;'zxcvbn,./~!@#$%^&*()_+QWERTYUIOP{}|ASDFGHJKL:"ZXCVBNM<>?`¡™£¢∞§¶•ªº–≠œ∑´®†¥¨ˆøπ“‘«åß∂ƒ©˙∆˚¬…æΩ≈ç√∫˜µ≤≥÷

œ∑´®†¥¨ˆøπåß∂ƒ©˙∆˚¬Ω≈ç√∫˜µ 

When you found the secret of holding the option key and typing qwertuiopasdfghjklzxcvbnm but instead it was œ∑´®†¥¨ˆøπåß∂ƒ©˙∆˚¬Ω≈ç√∫˜µ, congrats.
"Dude I just found a secret with my mac! I held down the option key and typed qwertyuiopasdfghjklzxcvbnm and turned into œ∑´®†¥¨ˆøπåß∂ƒ©˙∆˚¬Ω≈ç√∫˜µ!"

œ∑´®†¥¨ˆøπåß∂ƒ©˙∆˚¬Ω≈ç√∫˜µ 

This can only happen on a mac, it's when you've reached the ultimate level of boredom that you've discovered you can press alt/option while typing qwertyuiopasdfghjklzxcvbnm.
He was so bored he actually typed œ∑´®†¥¨ˆøπåß∂ƒ©˙∆˚¬Ω≈ç√∫˜µ

`¡™£¢∞§¶•ªº–≠œ∑´®†¥¨ˆøπ“‘«åß∂ƒ©˙∆˚¬…æΩ≈ç√∫˜µ≤≥÷ 

When you are SO bored that you type the whole keyboard whilst holding alt
`¡™£¢∞§¶•ªº–≠œ∑´®†¥¨ˆøπ“‘«åß∂ƒ©˙∆˚¬…æΩ≈ç√∫˜µ≤≥÷ man,

What the actual hell

`1234567890-=qwertyuiop[]\asdfghjkl;'zxcvbnm,./~!@#$%^&*()_+QWERTYUIOP{}|ASDFGHJKL:"ZXCVBNM<>?`¡™£¢∞§¶•ªº–≠œ∑´®†¥¨ˆøπ“‘«åß∂ƒ©˙∆˚¬…æΩ≈ç√∫˜µ≤≥÷` € fifl‡°·‚—±Œ„´‰ˇÁ¨ˆØ∏”’»ÅÍÎÏ˝ÓÔÒÚÆ¸˛Ç◊ı˜Â¯˘¿ 

`1234567890-=qwertyuiop\asdfghjkl;'zxcvbnm,./~!@#$%^&*()_+QWERTYUIOP{}|ASDFGHJKL:"ZXCVBNM<>?`¡™£¢∞§¶•ªº–≠œ∑´®†¥¨ˆøπ“‘«åß∂ƒ©˙∆˚¬…æΩ≈ç√∫˜µ≤≥÷` € fifl‡°·‚—±Œ„´‰ˇÁ¨ˆØ∏”’»ÅÍÎÏ˝ÓÔÒÚÆ¸˛Ç◊ı˜Â¯˘¿ is where the result of taking your finger and dragging it across all the buttons on you keyboard (the modern alphanumerical one), and once you have finished, you have hold down the shift key and do the same, and then you hold down the alt key doing the same, and then hold down both the shift and alt key at the same time doing the same thing, therefore writing down all of the characters possible for your keyboard to type. Congratulations on this accomplishment!
I can't believe I just typed out `1234567890-=qwertyuiop\asdfghjkl;'zxcvbnm,./~!@#$%^&*()_+QWERTYUIOP{}|ASDFGHJKL:"ZXCVBNM<>?`¡™£¢∞§¶•ªº–≠œ∑´®†¥¨ˆøπ“‘«åß∂ƒ©˙∆˚¬…æΩ≈ç√∫˜µ≤≥÷` € fifl‡°·‚—±Œ„´‰ˇÁ¨ˆØ∏”’»ÅÍÎÏ˝ÓÔÒÚÆ¸˛Ç◊ı˜Â¯˘¿ on my computer and named all of the characters possible on a modern day computer!

`¡™£¢∞§¶•ªº–≠œ∑´®†¥¨ˆøπ“‘«åß∂ƒ©˙∆˚¬…æω≈ç√∫˜µ≤≥÷` € fifl‡°·‚—±œ„´‰ˇá¨ˆø∏”’»åíîï˝óôòúæ¸˛ç◊ı˜â¯˘¿ 

When you are so bored that you run your finger across the entire keyboard whilst holding alt, then again whilst additionally holding shift
`¡™£¢∞§¶•ªº–≠œ∑´®†¥¨ˆøπ“‘«åß∂ƒ©˙∆˚¬…æΩ≈ç√∫˜µ≤≥÷` € fifl‡°·‚—±Œ„´‰ˇÁ¨ˆØ∏”’»ÅÍÎÏ˝ÓÔÒÚÆ¸˛Ç◊ı˜Â¯˘¿, WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE?!?!?!