Crumpet Face

Someone who's face is more pitted than the moon. Seal is a nae bad singer but he is a bit of a crumpet face.

Seal eighties singer and crumpet face.

by Duthart December 23, 2007

Coffee Crumpet

The anus.

It looks like that fellow's coffee crumpet has taken a firm pummelling.

Have you seen the size of that coffee crumpet?

by Redeeris November 2, 2010

Steamy Crumpet

A hot, fresh, juicy turd.

Last night Rachel was freaky and she climbed on top and dropped a steamy crumpet on my chest.

I had to run out of the meeting today to go drop a steamy crumpet.

This bathroom smells like a steamy crumpet. Who was it?

by Eaton Holgoode January 12, 2018

Crumple Crotch

a person who has cellulite so thick on their inner thigh's that when it reaches their "cookie"spot, all you can see is beat-up, dimpled BACON STRIPS.
(QUITE AN UNFORTUNATE EVENT TO OCCUR)

chunksahoy! there crumple crotch!!

by Miss Kali Kaos March 14, 2009

frog crumpet

An attractive French girl/woman.

From 'Atonement' by Ian McEwan.

The wine was taking hold of Corporal Nettle. He began a rambling eulogy of what he called "Frog crumpet" ­ how plentiful, how available, how delicious. It was all fantasy. The brothers looked at Robbie.

©Ian McEwan

by Kalivha November 21, 2009

bum crumpet

A toastable anally administered hot snack

"Has someone toasted a bum crumpet ?"

by GM March 25, 2003

crumpled

The act, process, or state of being totally fucked up. Usually off an assortment of liquor, beer, and drugs.

Jeff: Want to get crumpled tonight?
Roman: Definitely, I'll get the booze!

Andrew: Man, Kevin got so crumpled last night.

by Big Rig123 December 4, 2016