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I'm the schmuck who forgot that "anything goes" when I gave the lost Ark to "top men". 

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It belongs in a museum!
Yes, Dad --- I admit that I'm the schmuck who forgot that "anything goes" when I gave the lost Ark to "top men". Yeah, yeah --- just like I stupidly let your Grail diary fall into the hands of the Nazis! Don't call me "Junior".
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The Schmucks • I'm the schmuck who forgot that "anything goes" when I gave the lost Ark to "top men". • Schmucky the Cat • Schmucky the Clown • the • the game • the O • The Beatles • the boy • the shit

Schmucky the Clown 

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A Derogatory name for a person or persons who, though at times may be amusing, are really just a useless flap of skin that nobody really wants to deal with and is generally good for nothing.
"Hey, it's Schmucky the Clown! Now there's someone to stand in my way and tell me to do things that are 'not his job'! My workday is complete!"
Schmucky the Clown by Captain Hendu October 7, 2011
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Schmucky the Cat 

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Schmucky the Cat created Earth, the universe, and everything else Last Thursday, as taught in Last Thursdayism. Everything we remember seeing, hearing, doing, etc. is just an illusion created by Schmucky to fool us into thinking we have a past. It is not fully understood why Schmucky did this, but it is possible that he did not want us to know of his existence.
Excerpt from the first chapter of the first book of The Holy Chronicles of Schmucky:

1. Last Thursday, the almighty Schmucky the Cat didst create all things. 2. And after he didst so, he looked upon his creation and said, “Hey, I did a pretty good job!”
Schmucky the Cat by Gammastar April 30, 2008
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Toe Rag 

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A toe rag was originally a foot wrapping used, since mediaeval times up until the mid-nineteenth century, to protect the foot from chafing by boots or shoes. As these were, quite literally, rags they weren’t usually washed, and so with use they became very smelly until they were thrown away. Because of the similarity in smell, toe rag also became the name applied to dried, salted cod or other things with a strong, unpleasant, fishy smell. It didn’t take that long before the name was applied to someone who was an obnoxious, unpleasant OIC.
1 “Socks! Those aren’t socks you smelly git, they’re toe rags!”
2 “What have you been cooking? Smells like toe rag!”
3 “I can smell ‘er fanny from ‘ere, proper toe rag.”
4 That Heale Malcolm is a right toe rag.
Toe Rag by AKACroatalin November 29, 2016
Word of the Day on July 24, 2026
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Eternity leave 

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When some resigns or retires from a job, they are on "eternity leave". This can also refer to someone who has passed away, especially someone who worked somewhere for a long time, retired/resigned, then passed away later.
Oh I'm sorry, you didn't know that Kelly is on eternity leave? She resigned and moved to Hawaii!

With regrets I would like to inform you that my boss is officially on eternity leave. I will never see or hear them again. Ever.
Eternity leave by LingDanc803 February 7, 2023
Word of the Day on July 23, 2026
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jody 

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The hypothetical man (often a sinister character who decided not to go to boot camp) that is doing your girlfriend/wife while you are on deployment overseas.
Ain't no use in goin home,
Jody's got your girl and gone.
Ain't no use in goin back,
Jody's got your Cadillac,
Ain't no use in feeling blue,
Jody's took your checkbook too.
jody by Sgt Apan March 31, 2006
Word of the Day on July 22, 2026
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