spankin the monkey 

Beating yo meat like its dead

Yeah eric was spankin the monkey last night

spankin the monkey by Tarp Flarp Master February 27, 2017

tele-spankin' the monkey 

Term for when IT or sales staff "work from home" three days per week.

You can't get any fuckin' thing done around here because those support pukes are tele-spankin' the monkey.

tele-spankin' the monkey by Three Beers April 10, 2009

spanking the monkey 

waxing the carrot, choking the bishop, jacking the beanstock, yankee-ing the doodle,peting the one eyed wonder weasel, waxing the wood, caulking the cracks, jacking off, wanking.

"Oh dear jebus, jimmy is spanking the monkey in class!!!"

spanking the monkey by bhrome April 6, 2004

spanking the monkey 

Taking things in to your own hand or a hand trusted by you.

I woke up last night and found my monkey standing up. I spanked him and he went back to sleep.

spanking the monkey by David October 27, 2003

spanking the monkey 

masturbating

"I wanna spank the monkey"

spanking the monkey by C-dawgg January 19, 2003

spanking the monkey 

M

Don't disturb him he's in his bedroom spanking the monkey.

spanking the monkey by Not Bob at all March 10, 2018

SYNONYMS: chokin' the chicken, spanking the monkey, flogging the dolphin, beating off, jackin' off, buffing the banana, wanking off, playing with yourself, tootin' your horn, fighting the purple helmet warrior, rubbing the one-eyed snake, commiting spermi 

Some neurosurgeon posted a definition for masturbate with a bunch of synonyms and decided it would be a good idea to make them all one big link, which is how you got here to this page. Here's to that genius.

I hope that person catches AIDS from masturbating.



SYNONYMS: chokin' the chicken, spanking the monkey, flogging the dolphin, beating off, jackin' off, buffing the banana, wanking off, playing with yourself, tootin' your horn, fighting the purple helmet warrior, rubbing the one-eyed snake, commiting spermicide, taking your turn at the self-serve station, fishing with your zipper trout, beating the shit out of your midget friend, makin' mayo, polishing the family jewels, test-firing the old meat missle, wrapping the hand around the penis and moving it in a thrusting movement.

SYNONYMS: chokin' the chicken, spanking the monkey, flogging the dolphin, beating off, jackin' off, buffing the banana, wanking off, playing with yourself, tootin' your horn, fighting the purple helmet warrior, rubbing the one-eyed snake, commiting spermi by Catamount June 21, 2008