schitzophonic 

a person who uses a hands free device on their cell phone to hold conversations while performing mundane tasks such as shopping, giving the impression that they are having a conversation with themselves.

I hate it when a schitzophonic wlks up behind me. My first reaction is to respond and they always look at me like I'M crazy when I do.

schitzophonic by elvisluvsyu June 6, 2005

Schizophonicizm 

A dissociative identity disorder which manifests itself upon making or taking a telephone call. Schizophonicizm is characterized by the presence of two or more phone personalities which are utilized to achieve a desired end result or impression in any phone conversation. Less a form of manipulation, and more characteristic of defense and coping mechanisms, Schizophonicizm is born of a 21st century society where the art of face-to-face communication has been lost and the prevalence of electronic communication has enabled the masses to communicate across great distances. The various phone personalities of a Schizophonic are primarily differentiated by voice pitch and vocabulary utilization. The only known cure for Schizophnicizm is the complete and instantaneous abandonment of telephone and cellular phone use.

Dude 1: Hey man, you got your reports done for the week?
Dude 2: Nah man screw that BS. In fact, I’m never doing another one those ever again.
Ring…ring…
Dude 2: Hello
Hot Secretary: Heeeyyy sweetie! How are ya?....Yeah so when are you going to have your weekly reports turned in?
Dude 2: Wasssup gurl! Yeah, I was just cranking those bad boys out. Anything to help the bottom line. You know me. You’ll have them in a jiff!
Hot Secretary: Thanks!
Dude 2: You know it babycakes!
click
Dude 1: Dude, WTH?
Dude 2: What?
Dude 1: You never talk like that!
Dude 2: Sorry man, that’s just my Schizophonicizm acting up.

Schizophonicizm by UrbanCodeMan July 17, 2014

Schitzophrenicannibalisticsexfest.com 

A kickass song by Motionless In White, shares the same lyrics as .Com Pt. II on their new album Creatures. They are a screamo band that most likely has a wide fanbase of emo and goth people or scenesters:) If you like bands such as Alesana, The Word Alive, Asking Alexandria, or ISMFOF, chances are that you'll enjoy Motionless in White

Do you know the song .Com Pt. II?
Nope but i do know Schitzophrenicannibalisticsexfest.com

Schitzophrenicannibalisticsexfest.com by alesanaluvr January 23, 2011

schizophonia 

Schizophonia is the use of a cell phone in such a manner that mimics psychotic hallucinatory behavior.

A person with schizophonia might use a concealed bluetooth earphone to chat with an unseen partner in a crowded elevator while maintaining a fixed, vacant stare.

schizophonia by Stan Cohen January 9, 2008

Schizophonia 

When you think you feel your phone vibrate in you pocket, and you pull it out only to find that nobody tried to contact you

John thought he felt his phone vibrate in his pocket. When he pulled it out there were no new messages, or calls. He must be suffering from Schizophonia.

Schizophonia by Galen Knode January 17, 2009

schizophonia 

Having schizophrenia but to cover it up you have a blue-tooth headset in, so it looks like you are talking to someone but you're really talking to yourself.

Schizophrenic Bob is standing in an elevator and he screams, "Who do you think you are?!" Everyone around him looks at him, but they don't think anything of it because he has schizophonia.

schizophonia by Toast Ogden December 16, 2008

Schizophonia 

When after several months of the same ringtune, it becomes so familliar, you can hear it so vividly to the point where you answer your phone only to realize your phone didn't actually ring

Darryl - Hold on my phone is ringing
Ciaran - I don't hear anything
Darryl - No seriously where is my phone someone is trying to reach me
Ciaran - Dude you are suffering from schizophonia
Darryl - YEs...brb someone is phoning me again

Schizophonia by Jackywackywinky July 2, 2009