Skip to main content
Urban Dictionary Merch
Your favorite words on things you can wear, drink from, read, or give to a friend.
The Urban Dictionary Store sells gifts you’ll have to explain.

Absentee Printing 

The much maligned practice of printing eleventy billion pages in a busy computer lab and then leaving them unattended on a laser printer's paper tray for long periods of time. Absentee printers often confuse and annoy their fellow computer lab patrons as their excessive printing quickly buries the print jobs of other lab patrons.

This practice often forces harried college students to waste precious time sifting through dozens of pages of random senior theses, flyers, newsletters, and other miscellaneous crap in order to find their term papers, tragically thwarting last minute attempts to finish and print homework 5 minutes before class starts.

Chronic absentee printers often sit blissfully at their computers browsing Facebook for extremely long periods of time before retrieving their documents.

Absentee printing is endemic to college computer labs the world over.
Bob stormed in late to his philosopy class because his essay got caught up in the fray of absentee printing.

Jane stood hovering over the printer for five minutes as he waited for the 100 page print job of an anonymous absentee printer to hopelessly spew out of the printer.
Absentee Printing by iNetter December 1, 2009

3D Printing

The use of additive manufacturing to produce 3D models. Despite popular belief that this technology is useless. It is expanding quite rapidly

Ex. Previous cost- over 2000 dollars current cost- under 800 dollars

This technology will soon take over the world MWAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHH

I have no clue why I wrote this, I just got triggered my another untrue definition :/

Printing Press 

A niche one-person sex machine that distinctly resembles an old fashioned printing press.

There is a mechanical dildo which is inserted in a locomotive fashion into the vagina, anus or other orifice of the receiver. Simultaneously, there are paint rollers that move back and forth over the breasts or pectoral muscles of the subject and they are then lowered onto the paper where the ink/paint transfers to the paper. The printing on the paper happens in a 1 to 2 ratio - once for every two insertions of the dildo.
"I spent 15 minutes on the printing press last night....best orgasms I have ever had!"

Printing 

When you are carrying a gun, knife, any weapon concealed, but it prints through thinner layers of clothing.
I was carrying a big pistol this afternoon; big mistake. It got hot, I took off my jacket and it started printing through my shirt.
Printing by ChCx91 February 21, 2011

Printing Bandit 

A person notorious for sending items to a community printer or copy machine, and never picking them up.
Jarod: "Hey, did you print this? This is the 5th time somebodies printed something and never picked it up!

Eric: "No man, I thought that you printed it and left it there."

Danielle: "Sorry guys, that was me! My bad!"

Jarod and Eric: "Ah ha! Alas, we finally caught you! You are the printing bandit!"
Printing Bandit by bomcara October 6, 2009

Printing 

A stock/options market term originating during the WSB era, meaning to be making a lot of money on a trade.
Man that $500 $TSLA call I bought last mont is fuckin’ printing!
Printing by stonkman March 15, 2021
More from Urban Dictionary

proper lad 

a lad that is such a lad that he is a proper lad
person1:did you see bob
person2: ya he was a proper lad
Word of the Day on October 29, 2026
The number of years you are still sexually active
While our lifespan is the number of years we will live, our healthspan is the number of healthy years we will have and our sexspan is is the number of years we will continue to be healthy enough to continue having an active sex life.
sexspan by Dr Kat April 21, 2022
Word of the Day on October 28, 2026
A lighthearted reaction upon receiving disappointing news of some sort. Usually something that isn't a particularly a big deal, esp. when it primarily affects someone else - sort of a mild schadenfreude. Sometimes doubled or tripled, and possibly said in a sing-songy voice for added comedic effect to imitate a muted trumpet, which is how the meme originated.
You didn't get any napkins with your takeout pork fried rice? Womp womp.
womp by 175623226 November 3, 2011
Word of the Day on October 27, 2026
When your wife’s boyfriend let you sleep past 8pm 😎😎
Wife’s boyfriend: You have 5 more minutes
Me: Poggers!
Poggers by Just_Charles April 14, 2020
Word of the Day on October 26, 2026

Oblication 

A vacation, feeling more like an obligation, that involves visiting or staying with family.
So Joe where are you taking the kids for spring break vacation? We are going on an oblication to Boca to visit my mother-in-law.
Oblication by kimmerr May 5, 2011
Word of the Day on October 25, 2026

Surf Dracula Syndrome 

A phenomenon in film/television series, most notably streaming series, where the main premise is drawn out to such a point that it takes an entire season or more to get the parts of the series the audience is actually interested in seeing.

For example, if a series is titled "Surf Dracula," a majority of viewers would tune in expecting to see Dracula surfing by the first or second episode. However, the entire first season would instead be tedious padding and backstory before finally ending with Dracula surfing in the last five minutes of the season finale.
I watched "Smallville" on Netflix the other day. Dude, it was ten seasons of filler before he finally flew! Major Surf Dracula Syndrome!
Word of the Day on October 24, 2026
Load more