monkey spanking

masturbating

I was lying there spanking my monkey while I watched a porn video

by AntUK January 23, 2003

monkey spank

Male masturbation.

"I have some extra time...for a monkey spank!"

by x January 22, 2003

monkey spank

men fucktard townie

A guy who wastes his time spending hours playing playstation or spanking his monkey (masterbating).

Erika: "Sean, why are you being such a monkey spank? You've been playing playstation for fucking hours! Why don't you do some homework or hang out with your girlfriend?"

by The Anrkissed May 11, 2008

monkey spank

A phrase that means sperm, male reproductive cells, jizz.

I hate having monkey spank all over my keyboard after I watch porn.

by mfmc April 06, 2010

monkey spank

A total jack-off idiot

jeff's doin the monkey spank in the bathroom

by cupcarz June 25, 2005

monkey spank

A derogatory remark, usually directed toward a male.

"Greg is such a monkey spank."

by x January 22, 2003

Monkey-spank

A punishment administered to boys in British Secondary schools (now uncommon since corporal punishment outlawed in 1988) whereby the miscreant is called to the front of the class. There he is placed supine across the teachers knee, his trousers and knickers are pulled down below the calves and his buttocks are slapped as hard as possible with the open hand between 6-8 times. The recipient is then rolled over and receives a violent punch to the bell-end or scrotum with the clenched fist.
Usually carried out to re-inforce principles/basics when teaching quadratic algerbra.

Word, blud - you check Snoopi put glass n sheeat in Mr Campbell's tea?
Yea, dog! An got his batty messup widda Monkey-Spank! (said by a white kid)

by Reverend Tremendous Embakwame August 06, 2007