masterbatious

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An individual who is so sexually attractive that one may be tempted to masterbate to thoughts of them.

Dude, that girl who sat in front of us in econ today was so masterbatious.

masterbatious by PhrosTT January 17, 2006

Urban Dictionary Merch

masterbatious

to execasivly masterbate for pleasure several times a day

My friend Mike Ortiz is very masterbatious

masterbatious by Bandkid6666666666666666 May 4, 2009

ambi-masterbatious

the ability to masterbate with eithor hand.

Graig is so ambi-masterbatious. He was rubbing one out the other day with his left hand, got tired and finished with his right.

ambi-masterbatious by David R July 10, 2005

Management Masterbation

When Management does something purely for their gratification that will produce nothing.

Team building exersizes, employee surveys are just a few examples of management masterbation.

Management Masterbation by jayray59 May 6, 2010

violent masterbation

Masterbating in an extreme manner; associated with shaking, yelling, high speed, and possibly pain.

Josh had the greatest money-shots ever, but he died from too much violent masterbation.

violent masterbation by Bigg N October 27, 2006

Masterbation

Jacking off
Whacking off
Beating off
Smacking the ho
Beating the pig
Whipping the Wayne
Slapping the salami

Whacking the wand
Punishing the pubs
Burning the beet
Beating the beef
Beating the meat
Jerking the jerky
Jerkin' the gherkin
Working the slave
Choking the chicken
Or
In redneck terms
Buttering the corn
Revving the engine
Or
Hunting the deer

I want to choke my chicken to nicki Minaj that's Masterbation

Masterbation by Big baller 2000 January 18, 2016

Masterbation Coma

It happens after a person has masterbated. Mainly happens with guys. The person goes to sleep and wakes up late. Typically if your going to take a nap after masterbating you wont wake up for several hours. They will fall asleep and sleep longer than intended. But of course its a great sleep. Thus the Masterbation Coma.

Steve: Hey, Whats up?

Jon: Nothin.

Steve: Wheres Bob?

Jon: Ehh hes in a Masterbation Coma right now, Lets go with out him.

Steve: Alright.

Masterbation Coma by GuyWithSomeKnowledge March 27, 2009

You met me at a very Chinese time in my life

A moment in time where you feel distinctly Chinese over all other things.

Dante: "I wish I could be Nigerian, but I can't because I'm Chinese. You met me at a very Chinese time in my life."

You met me at a very Chinese time in my life by Sus Chad September 21, 2026

Word of the Day on September 25, 2026

crunchy

Adjective. Used to describe persons who have adjusted or altered their lifestyle for environmental reasons. Crunchy persons tend to be politically strongly left-leaning and may be additionally but not exclusively categorized as vegetarians, vegans, eco-tarians, conservationists, environmentalists, neo-hippies, tree huggers, nature enthusiasts, etc.

Also used to describe establishments where alternative foods and products are sold, i.e. natural food stores.

Modified derivative of granola.

"I need more crunchy guys in my life. I'm so tired of dating preppy metrosexual assholes."

"I'm heading out to the crunchy store to pick up some fair trade chocolate and tea tree oil, do you need anything?"

crunchy by EBC July 11, 2007

Word of the Day on September 24, 2026

Galantir

A group of people, typically women, searching through someone’s digital footprint in order to find more information about that person.

Susie wasn’t sure if her new Hinge match was a creep, so she assembled Galantir and they found out he used to post slurs on gaming forums.

Galantir by Ge-sus September 22, 2026

Word of the Day on September 23, 2026

murderhobo

In a tabletop game, a murderhobo is a player who murders NPCs indiscriminately. This is normally derogatory, referring to a player who totally ignores quests, dialog, backstory, trade, world building etc.

The term is most common with Dungeons and Dragons, but it can be applied to most RPGs where the player is allowed to kill most quest-giving NPCs and NPC traders. E.g. Elder Scrolls, Fallout, Divinity original sin.

DM: The sad little orphan girl tugs at Steve's trenchcoat to get his attention, and ask for help saving her pet dog from...
Steve: I'd like to roll a strength check against strangling the orphan.
Dave: I call dibs on the dog.
DM: You murderhobos disgust me.

murderhobo by Loup&S September 9, 2021

Word of the Day on September 22, 2026

Whale

In sales terms, a whale is a prospect that is significantly larger than an organization’s average customer.

Whales are large and extremely difficult to close. Due to their immense size, they are highly sought-after.

A whale is typically identified at first by a whale hunter on the sales team, but often requires cross-discipline participation in order to close; this includes assistance from operations, engineering, creative, client success, and business development teams.

"Shit...the sales director chewed me out on the sales call this morning. He's totally pissed that I have nothing in my pipeline. I've been focused on this one whale for so long that I haven't had time to prospect for normal-sized deals."

Whale by FQ_GFY February 3, 2020

Word of the Day on September 21, 2026