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jerkin the gerkin 

(use females' hand when availble), put lube on hand and and stroke cock
jerkin the gerkin by Braveheart January 9, 2004

jerkin the gerkin 

I caught him jerkin the gerkin
jerkin the gerkin by Bulgon Busto February 5, 2017

jerkin' the gerkin'

i jerk the gerkin' everyday
jerkin' the gerkin' by big al December 10, 2003

Jerkin' the gerkin with a merkin 

Of the male: Masturbating with a pubic wig on.
"Geeves, what on earth are you doing in Lord Boddington's room this late at night?"

"Sorry, ma'am, but I heard a commotion down the hall, so I scurried to investigate the matter. Twas but a false alarm, the young master was simply jerkin' the gerkin with a merkin"

From "Geeves, that the stupid thing off his genitals" by Forsworth Littlingshire

jerkin' the gherkin

Paul was jerkin' his gherkin to a Britney Spears video.

jerkin the gherkin 

A term used for male masturbation. Unsure of the background, maybe there are some guys out there with green vinegary penises.
"Brian had enough of MTV, so he turned to Television X for some real porn. Aroused, he began jerkin' the gherkin".