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You're a nurse and had a long day working fulltime plus six emergencies. One patient's left leg was wrongly amputated (it should have been his left nose wing). You cried because you felt his disbelief. And then he proposed to you on his intact knee which turned out weird. Your colleague Julie gives you a lift home and confesses her love to you. She is a single mum and we all know what thats about so you hug her, kiss her cheeks and tell her she is beautiful and you ask her to endure these hardships for one day someone will notice her angelic struggle and honor her for that.
You get out of the car all tense and confused and open the door only to be greeted by at least 8 envelopes containing bills. Now you get a little sad and quiet and open the fridge to find that one consoler. Did Jim drink all the fucking beers?
After a quick shower you slowly enter sleepo mode and lay down. Your breathing wakes Jim, he turns around and hugs you from behind, his hands 3D-silhouetting your body lines. After squeezing your buttcheeks you notice Jim's coming to life and lust and you dismiss the idea of falling asleep. Your fat ass circles his cobra which now arrows for its target. This kind of playing along with his kisses all over your neck and back and heavy breathing gets you so damn hot, horny and wet. You cant wait any longer. But Jim, the fucking teaser that he is, keeps you craving that first shove. You turn around and suck him off, sucking and slurping like its your last day on earth. Before he cums you turn around again offering him your dripping behind. He finishes and falls asleep in you.
in you by Krkič April 23, 2019
Urban Dictionary Merch

You got corn cobs in your ears 

Told to someone when they are not listening or they didn't understand something you told them. This is more politically correct instead of saying are you fucking deaf you retard.
You must not have heard me or do you got corn cobs in your ears?

i want to put my insides in you 

a guy cumming in a woman's pussy
hey "i want to put my insides in you"

we don't swim in your toilet, you don't pee in our pool. 

to let a person live and make their own decisions or not to clamp their style.
hey bro, you shouldn't do that
woah we don't swim in your toilet, you don't pee in our pool.

This Just In: You're a Jackass 

A smart-ass retaliation to the insult Newsflash: I don't care.
Dude 1: Hey, did you know I just got a raise?
Dude 2: Newsflash: I don't care.
Dude 1: This just in: you're a jackass.

Put you in your place 

To put someone in his place is to say or do something that lets another person know he is not as special, powerful or important as he thinks he is.
When a teacher tells the supposed class clown “i will put you in your place”.
Put you in your place by Mr..Right October 14, 2018

Shut the hell up before I shove a cactus so far up your ass you'll have more pricks in your mouth than your father had on Pride's Month 

something that many, many people would like to tell people
"Shut the hell up before I shove a cactus so far up your ass you'll have more pricks in your mouth than your father had on Pride's Month," said little Jimmy "Damn, little Jimmy, you need to chill out," said his bully, getting out the gasoline and matches."
More from Urban Dictionary
A group of people, typically women, searching through someone’s digital footprint in order to find more information about that person.
Susie wasn’t sure if her new Hinge match was a creep, so she assembled Galantir and they found out he used to post slurs on gaming forums.
Galantir by Ge-sus September 22, 2026
Word of the Day on September 23, 2026

murderhobo 

In a tabletop game, a murderhobo is a player who murders NPCs indiscriminately. This is normally derogatory, referring to a player who totally ignores quests, dialog, backstory, trade, world building etc.

The term is most common with Dungeons and Dragons, but it can be applied to most RPGs where the player is allowed to kill most quest-giving NPCs and NPC traders. E.g. Elder Scrolls, Fallout, Divinity original sin.
DM: The sad little orphan girl tugs at Steve's trenchcoat to get his attention, and ask for help saving her pet dog from...
Steve: I'd like to roll a strength check against strangling the orphan.
Dave: I call dibs on the dog.
DM: You murderhobos disgust me.
murderhobo by Loup&S September 9, 2021
Word of the Day on September 22, 2026
In sales terms, a whale is a prospect that is significantly larger than an organization’s average customer.

Whales are large and extremely difficult to close. Due to their immense size, they are highly sought-after.

A whale is typically identified at first by a whale hunter on the sales team, but often requires cross-discipline participation in order to close; this includes assistance from operations, engineering, creative, client success, and business development teams.
"Shit...the sales director chewed me out on the sales call this morning. He's totally pissed that I have nothing in my pipeline. I've been focused on this one whale for so long that I haven't had time to prospect for normal-sized deals."
Whale by FQ_GFY February 3, 2020
Word of the Day on September 21, 2026

Concrete cowboy 

A guy who thinks he's a country kinda guy, but in reality lives a comfortable city / suburban life.
Eugene: Look at that dude in the cowboy hat!
Todd: He's just a concrete cowboy.
Word of the Day on September 20, 2026
any hard liquor that is cheap & potent.. eg. relska, popov, potters, evan williams, kamchatka, fireball, rumpleminze, southern comfort, everclear
hey let's get a drink of that?

go ahead
*takes drink* ugh wtf is that?

everclear & bepsi
fucking hobo loko eeessshh
hobo loko by d i z k o 2 0 8 September 14, 2026
Word of the Day on September 19, 2026

God Shot 

A chance happening with profound meaning, an unexpected blessing, a "sign".
Dr. Drew on Celebrity Rehab said "All of a sudden what had been just another Hollywood proposal became for him an unexpected blessing, an opportunity for growth. In drug recovery language, that's called a "God shot."
God Shot by Imogen1564 February 25, 2011
Word of the Day on September 18, 2026
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