A company founded in 1953 by Cave Johnson, originally to create shower curtains for the U.S. Military, but went in a different direction after Johnson went insane from mercury poisoning. Most notable works include the Aperture Science Handheld Portal Device, and the supercomputer GLaDOS. Considered a rival to Black Mesa.

Aperture Science.

We do what we must, because we can.

Aperture Science by Dr. Paine July 19, 2009

Aperture

1. A small narrow opening.

2. A fixed or adjustable opening in a piece of equipment such as a camera or microscope that lets light pass through a lens or mirror.

3. The diameter of an aperture in a piece of equipment such as a camera.

See definition of aperture above.

Aperture by Jafje April 15, 2007

Aperture

A lovely little scientific research and development company enlisted by the American MoD to produce shower curtains, among other intra-dimensional projects. Responsible for the production of the Genetic Lifeform and Disk Operating System (GLaDOS), the Aperture Science Handheld Portal Device (Portal gun, if you prefer), and many, many innovative iterations of the world-famous shower curtain, Aperture are secretive in their operations and productive in their exploits. Future projects include life-enhancing gel, spherical personality buddies and tractor beams (or excursion funnels).

Welcome to the Aperture Science Computer Assisted Enrichment Centre.

Aperture Science - a trusted friend in science.

Aperture by Jonnopon3000 July 11, 2010

fapertunity

Noun:

1) The opportunity to masturbate or "fap" freely without concern about interruption while significant others, roommates, parents or kids are out of the house.
2) Sometimes a fapertunity maybe used to setup a masturbation station in common areas as to enjoy this time most.

Example: John made the most of his fapertunity by using the living room, big screen tv and surround sound.

fapertunity by DragonBallzDiep June 19, 2013

Anal Aperture in Chief

An increasingly popular nickname for the 45th POTUS despite it being cumbersome to use.

Having chosen Tulsa, a symbol for our deep American racial divide, for his next campaign rally, the Anal Aperture in Chief has hit rock bottom and chosen a venue that will galvanize equal rights protests all over the world.

Anal Aperture in Chief by Dr Bunnygirl June 11, 2020

Fapture

The day where everybody in the entire world faps.

We were warned. Its coming. December 24, 2012. The day everybody faps. Fapture. Get ready. A shitload of cum is cumming your way.

Fapture by fapfapfapfapf4p July 9, 2011

Whale

In sales terms, a whale is a prospect that is significantly larger than an organization’s average customer.

Whales are large and extremely difficult to close. Due to their immense size, they are highly sought-after.

A whale is typically identified at first by a whale hunter on the sales team, but often requires cross-discipline participation in order to close; this includes assistance from operations, engineering, creative, client success, and business development teams.

"Shit...the sales director chewed me out on the sales call this morning. He's totally pissed that I have nothing in my pipeline. I've been focused on this one whale for so long that I haven't had time to prospect for normal-sized deals."

Whale by FQ_GFY February 3, 2020

Word of the Day on September 21, 2026

Concrete cowboy

A guy who thinks he's a country kinda guy, but in reality lives a comfortable city / suburban life.

Eugene: Look at that dude in the cowboy hat!
Todd: He's just a concrete cowboy.

Concrete cowboy by EugeneJohnson42000 March 16, 2024

Word of the Day on September 20, 2026

hobo loko

any hard liquor that is cheap & potent.. eg. relska, popov, potters, evan williams, kamchatka, fireball, rumpleminze, southern comfort, everclear

hey let's get a drink of that?

go ahead
*takes drink* ugh wtf is that?

everclear & bepsi
fucking hobo loko eeessshh

hobo loko by d i z k o 2 0 8 September 14, 2026

Word of the Day on September 19, 2026

God Shot

A chance happening with profound meaning, an unexpected blessing, a "sign".

Dr. Drew on Celebrity Rehab said "All of a sudden what had been just another Hollywood proposal became for him an unexpected blessing, an opportunity for growth. In drug recovery language, that's called a "God shot."

God Shot by Imogen1564 February 25, 2011

Word of the Day on September 18, 2026

city chicken

A food native to Pittsburgh/Western Pennsylvania in which cubes of pork and/or veal are put on a short, wooden skewer, breaded, then baked and/or fried.

I've heard that city chicken originated during the Great Depression, when folks didn't have enough money to buy full cuts of meat, so they assembled meat scraps on a wooden skewer, creating a make-shift drumstick. Hence the name.

Are yinz havin' city chicken for dinner?

city chicken by TRF August 31, 2006

Word of the Day on September 17, 2026

Is that cake?

Another way to say is this fake? Like the show real or cake

“Slayyyter just announced another album last night”
“No way, is that cake?”
“Yeah whoops this isn’t real”

Is that cake? by Sexyyred September 15, 2026

Word of the Day on September 16, 2026