Once, an ugly girl that was making a pass at me described that she wasn't feeling very well.
I said, "Well, if I were a doctor, I think I might diagnose you with Ed Zachary Disease."
She asked what it was and I said, "When your face look Ed Zachary like yo ass."
She wasn't amused.
An incurable STD that is like a blue waffle times 1000 that causes your genitalia to turn black, seep, farm boils, and eventually fall off. It lives troglos underpants and is both airborne and fatal.