To put your dick to the telephone speaker when talking to a ladyfriend when she is boring the arse off you about babies or flowers or something elsethat's all girlyfied.
Dicktaphone is when on the phone to Ann Coulter and she's banging on about politics or crap etc. and you realise you're her husband as your cock falls out of your pants into the reciever.
Is when you are on the phone with your girlfriend or boyfriend ( If you swing that way ) and you slap your dick on the mouthpiece of your mobile phone. This usually makes a loud thumping sound that the other party hears.
Ashley: What is thatthumping sound i hear ?
Tim: That is me giving you a dictaphone !
Ashley: Awwwww, Thanks Baby !! I hope you can give me a dictaphone EVERYDAY !!!