crumpeter 

One who makes crumpets.

The crumpeter made them this morning.

crumpeter by @Riflerangehoney April 7, 2017

crumpet party 

The female equivalent to a lemon party, this occurs when more than two elderly women get together to butter each other's crumpets. Not to be confused with mah dong night, during which more than two elderly women get together to watch male strippers.

"Hey, hon, where's your mother?"
"Off playing bridge with the gals, I guess."
"Ah, Christ, not another crumpet party!"

crumpet party by userbits March 7, 2010

crapeteria

A foul rank disgusting workplace cafeteria

Hey, wanna go get some rancid lunch in the crapeteria

crapeteria by steve austin July 20, 2004

crumpler 

A technical term used in the toilet paper industry to describe a person who crumples the toilet paper into a ball before cleansing themselves. Opposite of a folder.

Man 1: How do you wipe your ass?
Man 2: Oh, I'm a crumpler.

crumpler by thecrumpler July 2, 2006

chupeter

(verb) to walk quickly without running. The 'ch' is pronounced like the 'ch' in 'Loch'

We need to chupeter back to the car to hear the footy results

chupeter by laurafrobisher October 22, 2013

trumpeter's lips 

When the anal sphincter is puckered and slightly open due to a state of extreme fear, resembling a trumpeter's lips

It was a bleak winter's day on the somme, rifle in hand and with the trumpeter's lips Rupert knew he would be going over the top today and meet his demise on foreign soil

trumpeter's lips by Loopydave December 1, 2018

Tooth Tarnishing Crumpet Cruncher

A racist term against the English.

See also:
Crumpet Cruncher
Tooth Tarnishing Twat

those damn tooth tarnishing crumpet crunchers are stealing our land again

Tooth Tarnishing Crumpet Cruncher by The Insult Man May 19, 2021