Loopydave's definitions

chopped up gorilla

The pubic region of a dark haired lady, who never maintains her ladygarden, when on her period.

Rupert was aghast when he was Mary's snatch for the first time during rag week, her lack of maintenance of her pubic mound resulted in what looked like a chopped up gorilla

by Loopydave April 11, 2024

rolled up phone book

An arse splittingly wide shit, usually the result of stuffing yourself the day before with kebab, steak, fine cheeses, etc... and dehydration caused by excess alcohol.

Rupert howled, when the morning after the pickles and cheese party he had to pass a rolled up phone book

by Loopydave May 12, 2020

yodeling starfish

An unwashed anus passing wind

Rupert was horrified when he went to eat Mary out at being greeted by a yodeling starfish just centimeters from his face

by Loopydave February 12, 2020

Brown Goliath

A massive dump. A shit of biblical proportions

Rupert had to ask his wife Mary to inspect his anal sphincter for damage after heaving out a Brown Goliath that morning

by Loopydave October 24, 2019

rhyl spice

Ultra strong synthetic cannabis blends or powders openly sold on the streets of the North Wales drugs haven known as Rhyl (where addicts come to die). Leaves users sitting in their own shit and rocking

Rupert realized he had overdone it on Rhyl Spice when he looked at the clock and was unable to tell the time his head was so fucked

by Loopydave April 6, 2019

nodding dog

A woman, usually drunk and ugly, performing oral sex in the back seat of a car. In reference to the bobble head 'nodding' characters British people would put in the rear window of there car, often a Churchill Dog.

Office manager Rupert received the full nodding dog treatment from the drunk PA Mary in the taxi on the way home from the office party.

by Loopydave March 15, 2019

paul daniels weed

Extremely strong dense nuggets of cannabis. So called because when you put a tiny nugget in a grinder and grind then open it you are shocked by the amount of ground cannabis in there and shout out "Magic!", the catchphrase of the late and annoying twat of a magician Paul Daniels

Rupert realized he had bought paul daniels weed when after a single blunt he could barely move and feasted on Rice Crispies

by Loopydave February 21, 2019