Skip to main content

Calibrations 

Either an activity that must be done constantly, or something you bring up when you want to subtly tell someone to go fuck themselves.
Shepard: "Hey Garrus, got a minute?"
Garrus: "Can it wait for a bit? I'm in the middle of some calibrations."

calibration

1. The proccess of data acquisition (obtained by comparison against standards) able to anticipate the behavior of someting.
2. The data so obtained.
3. The final report or documentation showing such data.
4. The stage in which someting is regarding the level of its calibration knoledge.
Adjustment is not calibration. When we adjust something we change its behavior (usually to move it closer to standards aiming a better performance); when we calibrate we just understand its behavior so that we can compensate or even adjust it.
calibration by Arturo Cortijo March 11, 2008

impact calibration 

The technical terminology for hitting any sort of electronic device to get it to work properly; a solid and punctuated smack or slap.
"Theo noticed the screen on his iPad was slightly scrambled so he quickly implemented the impact calibration principle to the edge of the device. One good smack and the screen was clear as the blue sky on a summer's day.

percussion calibration 

The process of beating the snot out of a piece of equipment to get it to work properly
I had to perform a minor percussion calibration on that IBM workstation until it cooperated.

calibratio 

The act of spending an excessive amount of time calibrating a piece of home electronics, e.g. a home theater or stereo system.
My buddy said he would buy me a six-pack if I came over and performed calibratio on his new HDTV.
calibratio by swoodie February 24, 2009

calibrating cabbages 

When you get asked what you have been up to and have nothing interesting to say
Person 1: So what have you been up to lately?

Person 2: Not much just calibrating cabbages
calibrating cabbages by Dr Cabbage September 9, 2010