blastoised 

to consume alcohol to the point where all motor functions have atrophied, to the point where you're completely blacked out, to the point where you're shooting hydro pump... out of your mouth.

man, did you see that kid frat hopping last night? he must have been absolutely blastoised by the time he hit his 8th frat house.

blastoised by jamesthebig wang October 17, 2006

Awkward Blastoise 

When an awkward turtle is insufficient for the awkwardity of the situation, one must "evolve" their awkward turtle into the Awkward Blastoise. This hand configuration uses the pointer and pinky finger of the top hand as Hydro Pumps to douse the situation.

While visiting his girlfriend's parents, Rob farted at the dinner table very loudly. The mom implemented the awkward turtle, but was immediately over-ruled by the dad's more appropriate use of the Awkward Blastoise in order to sufficiently encompass the awkwardity of the situation.

Awkward Blastoise by Cypress A 106 April 24, 2009

Blastoise 

When you piss in her eye while screaming "BLASTOISE USE WATER GUN"

"yo what you want to do tonight?"
"I kinda want to do a BLASTOISE"
"Oh so you wanna get that slippery, say no more"

Blastoise by Stanky the Herbivore YT September 5, 2016

blastoising 

When you jack off two guys over your shoulder, aiming their jizz at your partner. Yelling "You do not have enough badges to train me!"

The party was lame until they guys started blastoising.

blastoising by PokeRage September 14, 2013

Blastoise 

An awesome Water type pokemon quipped with dual pumps. Its hydrop pump is capable of piercing steel. Also has a hard shell.

That blastoise used hydro pump to get in the bank and steal the money.

Blastoise by I_Destroy_all September 5, 2010

Blastoise 

One of the great water pokémon, fully equipted with a duel hydro pump. He must have a HUUUGE BLUE COCK!

mmmmMmmmmmmmMmmmmmm! wet cock...

Blastoise by longis. November 29, 2004

Blastoise 

A form of sexual intercourse, when you put two water gun into a woman's vagina and anus and blasting her.

Note: water guns can be replaced with male penis's

Me and my friend blastoised each other

Blastoise by berry-chaan September 9, 2010