black keys
black keys by Jason Hickey February 4, 2004
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Black Keys Matter
The modern piano fan’s way to be offended by anti-black racism while at the same mocking the PC and Black Lives Matter.
In Traditional, Europe-based Music Notation the black keys on a piano only have slave names. The white keys all have the letter names A, B, C, D, E, F or G. But all of the lowly black piano keys are called a ‘sharp’ or a ‘flat’ of their white supremacist piano keyboard neighbors.
The black keys are like welcoming servants who help the player navigate the keyboard by sight or by touch. And they don’t even have their own letter names! OMG! How racist is that?
In Traditional, Europe-based Music Notation the black keys on a piano only have slave names. The white keys all have the letter names A, B, C, D, E, F or G. But all of the lowly black piano keys are called a ‘sharp’ or a ‘flat’ of their white supremacist piano keyboard neighbors.
The black keys are like welcoming servants who help the player navigate the keyboard by sight or by touch. And they don’t even have their own letter names! OMG! How racist is that?
“Hey man you and your piano are blocking traffic. Do ya need help gettin’ that upright off the street?”
“I’m here to raise awareness of the plight of the black piano keys. They all got the slave names of their white key neighbors. The black keys are oppressed by white key supremacists. Can you tell me what’s so special about the whiteys that they get such special treatment?”
“Well... lookin’ at your piano I can see the white keys have different shapes and the black keys all look the same.”
“All the blacks look alike to you! You must be a piano racist. Get outta here you ignorant, Nazi white key supremacist! Black Keys Matter! Black Keys Matter! ... ”
“I’m here to raise awareness of the plight of the black piano keys. They all got the slave names of their white key neighbors. The black keys are oppressed by white key supremacists. Can you tell me what’s so special about the whiteys that they get such special treatment?”
“Well... lookin’ at your piano I can see the white keys have different shapes and the black keys all look the same.”
“All the blacks look alike to you! You must be a piano racist. Get outta here you ignorant, Nazi white key supremacist! Black Keys Matter! Black Keys Matter! ... ”
Black Keys Matter by pianocheater September 20, 2016
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The Black Keys
Modern blues band consisting of Dan Auerbach (guitarist/vocalist) and Patrick Carney (drummer) from Akron Ohio. Their music sounds just as amazing live if not better than their albums. They don't quite feel retro or especially arcane. Their music is dirty, grungy, noisy, swampy blues with a lot of soul.
They were first signed when college dudes with Polo shirts and sandals on were walking straight out of the a club in Oxford Mississippi while The Black Keys were playing. They knew that the guys from Fat Possum (their record label) were also there which made The Black Keys extremely nervous. But later the guys from Fat Possum said that's how they test their bands - if everybody from Oxford walks out then they sign 'em (laughs).
The Black Keys will one day find their place in classic rock history if they already haven't with the fans they have today.
They were first signed when college dudes with Polo shirts and sandals on were walking straight out of the a club in Oxford Mississippi while The Black Keys were playing. They knew that the guys from Fat Possum (their record label) were also there which made The Black Keys extremely nervous. But later the guys from Fat Possum said that's how they test their bands - if everybody from Oxford walks out then they sign 'em (laughs).
The Black Keys will one day find their place in classic rock history if they already haven't with the fans they have today.
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