Urban Dictionary Merch
Your favorite words on things you can wear, drink from, read, or give to a friend.
The Urban Dictionary Store sells gifts you’ll have to explain.
Butt-Stabbing Bandit
The name is quite self-explanatory, but don't let that make you thing you know everything you need to about the Butt-Stabbing Bandit. He is a ferocious monster that crawled out of hell itself, hungering for one thing; butt-related injuries.
If you are a guy, imagine having dozens of miniature testicles up your bum. Now picture them all bursting with the brutal stab of a 220 lbs. man and his full force punch of a 5 inch rusty carbon steel tactical knife. If you are a woman, well, I don't know how to relate it to you. So just imagine something really bad up your butt. Like childbirth! That's it, imagine you are giving birth in your ass. But...it reverses, I guess. Whatever.
This is the dark reality of few Americans. This occurrence is rare, and only seldom caught on tape. The side effects of an attack by the Butt-Stabbing Bandit include:
-Bleeding (duh)
-Crying
-Feeling of extreme pain
-Loss of bowel control (eww)
-Nightmares
-Depressing
-Rage
-More crying
-Anxiety
Note: One of the main results of an assault by the Butt-Stabbing Bandit results in the possible change in sexuality. The first stab changes you to the sexuality opposite from your original one. The second changes you back. And so on and so forth, leaving you at the mercy of if he stabs you an odd or even number of times.
If you are a guy, imagine having dozens of miniature testicles up your bum. Now picture them all bursting with the brutal stab of a 220 lbs. man and his full force punch of a 5 inch rusty carbon steel tactical knife. If you are a woman, well, I don't know how to relate it to you. So just imagine something really bad up your butt. Like childbirth! That's it, imagine you are giving birth in your ass. But...it reverses, I guess. Whatever.
This is the dark reality of few Americans. This occurrence is rare, and only seldom caught on tape. The side effects of an attack by the Butt-Stabbing Bandit include:
-Bleeding (duh)
-Crying
-Feeling of extreme pain
-Loss of bowel control (eww)
-Nightmares
-Depressing
-Rage
-More crying
-Anxiety
Note: One of the main results of an assault by the Butt-Stabbing Bandit results in the possible change in sexuality. The first stab changes you to the sexuality opposite from your original one. The second changes you back. And so on and so forth, leaving you at the mercy of if he stabs you an odd or even number of times.
Guy 1: Dude, what happened to you? We haven't seen you in weeks! I called your house, but all your roommate said was that you were in the hospital.
Guy 2: Nothing, man, nothing. *Starts to walk away, revealing the intensive bandage wrapping on his ass-region.
Guy 1: What's up with your ass, man?
Guy 2: I was.. I got attacked by the Butt-Stabbing Bandit, okay?!? Happy now?
Guy 1: Holy shit, dude... I had no idea. I'm sorry, like, I don't know what to say.
Guy 2: Just go, man. *Dark black and white flashback of attack* *Tear roles down cheek*
Guy 1: You okay?
Guy 2: Just go....
Guy 2: Nothing, man, nothing. *Starts to walk away, revealing the intensive bandage wrapping on his ass-region.
Guy 1: What's up with your ass, man?
Guy 2: I was.. I got attacked by the Butt-Stabbing Bandit, okay?!? Happy now?
Guy 1: Holy shit, dude... I had no idea. I'm sorry, like, I don't know what to say.
Guy 2: Just go, man. *Dark black and white flashback of attack* *Tear roles down cheek*
Guy 1: You okay?
Guy 2: Just go....
Butt-Stabbing Bandit by JasperRide March 29, 2015
Related Words
STBBI • sibbie • Stabbin Cabin • Stabbing Westward • sabbir • sebbing • stabbing • sabbie • Sebbie • stability
stabbity
inclined to stab or appearing inclined to stab, at persons or things through aggravation or other stabworthy moods.
stabbity by drunkenmarauder January 22, 2008
Subbing
The act of addressing an issue indirectly that someone has created by saying it out loud and without referring directly to the individual.
Students knew the teacher was subbing when he warned the class about the consequences of arriving late to school only after Johnny appeared 20 minutes late.
Stabbing Yourself In The Face With All The Cracks Of Blood
“Yo, do you know what I’m thinking right now?”
“Stabbing Yourself In The Face With All The Cracks Of Blood??”
“Cmon”
“Stabbing Yourself In The Face With All The Cracks Of Blood??”
“Cmon”
Stabbing Yourself In The Face With All The Cracks Of Blood by LZ22 October 17, 2019
Captain Stabbin'
A Porn made by Reality Kings (Not Bang Brothers as Family Guy suggests.) in which a guy wearing a Captian's Hat has anal sex with a bunch of chicks on a boat.
This is the reference to it on Family Guy.
Woman: Hello, Fundamental Industries. How can I help you?
Brian Griffin: Yeah... Uh... Is this... Is this Bang Brothers?
Woman: Yes.
Brian Griffin: Oh, okay. I-I'd like to cancel my subscription.
Woman: Uh, what's your name?
Brian Griffin: Brian Griffin.
Woman: And which site did you belong to?
Brian Griffin: Uh, Captain Stabbin'.
Woman: And how are you spelling that?
Brian Griffin: Uh... Um, Captain, full word, then Stabbin', S-T-A-B-B-I-N-Apostrophe.
Woman: Okay, I'm checking.
Brian Griffin: You know, instead of a G at the end.
Woman: I'm sorry sir, I'm not finding that site. Uh, what was the subject matter?
Brian Griffin: Um, uh... A guy doing chicks on a boat in a, uh, a captain's hat.
Woman: Okay, I'm checking.
Brian: The uh... The passengers had just signed up for a tour of the harbor, and um... And all that stuff happened.
Woman: Hello, Fundamental Industries. How can I help you?
Brian Griffin: Yeah... Uh... Is this... Is this Bang Brothers?
Woman: Yes.
Brian Griffin: Oh, okay. I-I'd like to cancel my subscription.
Woman: Uh, what's your name?
Brian Griffin: Brian Griffin.
Woman: And which site did you belong to?
Brian Griffin: Uh, Captain Stabbin'.
Woman: And how are you spelling that?
Brian Griffin: Uh... Um, Captain, full word, then Stabbin', S-T-A-B-B-I-N-Apostrophe.
Woman: Okay, I'm checking.
Brian Griffin: You know, instead of a G at the end.
Woman: I'm sorry sir, I'm not finding that site. Uh, what was the subject matter?
Brian Griffin: Um, uh... A guy doing chicks on a boat in a, uh, a captain's hat.
Woman: Okay, I'm checking.
Brian: The uh... The passengers had just signed up for a tour of the harbor, and um... And all that stuff happened.
Captain Stabbin' by MewWinx96 October 6, 2012
cabin stabbing
An episode of rough sex involving the use of the penis as a weapon to "stab" the female.
It elicits a reaction celled "agony" in Jamaican lingo, but is far from painful.
Similar to daggering, but without the intervention of clothes.
It elicits a reaction celled "agony" in Jamaican lingo, but is far from painful.
Similar to daggering, but without the intervention of clothes.
Happy Abbey slept snug as a bug in a rug after she had been hauled against a wall for some cabin stabbing.
"I'm tired of holding hands and watching movies", grumbled Anna. "When are you going to give me a proper cabin stabbing?".
"I'm tired of holding hands and watching movies", grumbled Anna. "When are you going to give me a proper cabin stabbing?".
cabin stabbing by BioHazardX May 18, 2014
More from Urban Dictionary
WhimZ
Frothability
The measure of an emotional and over zealous consumer in an upwardly charging market, also known as a bull market. It's characterized by rising asset prices, increased investor confidence, and favorable growth in the markets, bro.
The frothability was evident as over-zealous consumers eagerly engaged in bidding wars, driving property prices to unsustainable levels reminiscent of previous speculative bubbles.
Frothability by cptn.kagaroo1 January 26, 2024
Word of the Day on November 12, 2026
Soul digger
A man who dates women with the sole purpose of exploiting their time, energy, and labor while he sucks the joy and happiness from their lives.
"That guy's a soul digger. He'll expect you to work full time, but you'll be doing all the cooking, cleaning, laundry, shopping, and childcare while he plays video games or watches TV."
Soul digger by anonymous November 11, 2026
Word of the Day on November 11, 2026
pod person
A person pretending to be something they aren't, or an impostor. This is inferred because of the old alien movies where alien pods appear on earth and the "pod people" dispose of the humans and slowly reproduce the bodies, pretending to be humans.
The pod person was pretending to be my father, but I knew that he was an alien when he acted differently than my father ever would have.
pod person by Christopher M. May 9, 2005
Word of the Day on November 10, 2026
dead drop
A dead drop is a location used to secretly pass items between two people, without requiring them to meet.
Spies have been known to use dead drops, using various techniques to hide the items and to signal that the drop has been made. Drug dealers use this as well.
A common place is to duct tape the item to the underside of a toilet cover in a public restroom.
A signal is sometimes used as well to indicate there is something to pickup, like a pile of stones in a certain formation. After checking the drop the signal is removed.
Spies have been known to use dead drops, using various techniques to hide the items and to signal that the drop has been made. Drug dealers use this as well.
A common place is to duct tape the item to the underside of a toilet cover in a public restroom.
A signal is sometimes used as well to indicate there is something to pickup, like a pile of stones in a certain formation. After checking the drop the signal is removed.
"The dead drop is the restroom toilet at the Gulf station at the corner of Commercial Ave. and Georges Rd."
dead drop by rubberroom July 23, 2008
Word of the Day on November 9, 2026
No Surprises Wedding
A "No Surprises Wedding," or NSW, is a wedding invitation designation that tells attendees that there can be no unplanned announcements, engagements, events or speeches at the wedding - all actions must be pre-approved by the couple. Anyone who performs an unapproved "surprise" will be asked to leave the wedding early.
This designation comes from Reddit, where so many stories of bad wedding behavior indicated a need to communicate expectations for the wedding behavior of attendees.
This designation comes from Reddit, where so many stories of bad wedding behavior indicated a need to communicate expectations for the wedding behavior of attendees.
You are cordially invited to the nuptials of Brian and Tom on October 31 at noon.
Please note that this wedding is child-free (under 10) and a No Surprises Wedding (NSW). Reach out to wedding planner Sami Smith to request approvals or exceptions; please note that exceptions will be rare. Limited child care for under-10s will be available. All approvals will be noted and included in planning. Unapproved, or surprise exceptions, will result in guests being asked to leave.
Please note that this wedding is child-free (under 10) and a No Surprises Wedding (NSW). Reach out to wedding planner Sami Smith to request approvals or exceptions; please note that exceptions will be rare. Limited child care for under-10s will be available. All approvals will be noted and included in planning. Unapproved, or surprise exceptions, will result in guests being asked to leave.
No Surprises Wedding by dbdefenestrate August 27, 2023
Word of the Day on November 8, 2026