IM Police

Name: IM Police Mug
Brand: Urban Dictionary
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The IM Police is a self-appointed task force of suck-ups, out to rid the world of working-from-home slackers. They constantly refresh IM contact lists, looking for idle timers that exceed three seconds.

Unfortunately, their sleuth skills are very limited and usually lead to debacular accusations. They make Barney Fife look like a supercop in comparison.

Sgt Peterson, IM Police: Uh, can you explain why you went idle for 12 seconds just now? If you are working from home, you need to be working.

Abe: I'm on vacation, you pwned nitwit.

Sgt Peterson, IM Police: Oh... uh... see any good movies lately?

IM Police by moraleboatanchor March 27, 2013

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Its that a weed "no its a crayon" im calling the police

Girl: Is that a weed

Guy: No this is a crayon

Girl: I'm calling the police

Microwave: 911 what's your emergency

Guy: *visible confusion*

Its that a weed "no its a crayon" im calling the police

Its that a weed "no its a crayon" im calling the police by Old Chicken Nugets May 22, 2019

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Nigga I'm callin police

Phrase that protects you from black thugs

Nigga: Hey mufuka give me that shit or I cut yo throat

Man: Nigga I'm callin police

Nigga I'm callin police by Chief Nigiris October 8, 2011

I'm calling the police

A term used when someone does something extremely bad, weird, fucked up, degenerative, sexual, horny, frowned upon, or just something that makes your stomach feel like shit, or makes your heart actually fucking stop for a second because you need to catch a breath after seeing what bullshit someone posts or say. This term can also be used on sexual messages, if someone is being weird, people typically reply with "I'm calling the police" "What the fuck", and "FBI OPEN UP!". The phrase / slang "I'm calling the police" is an effective way to tell someone to shut the fuck up, and for them to reconsider their life before saying something again or to tell someone your really fucked up and need psychotic help now. The term is similar to replying the suicide hotline number "1-800-273-TALK (8255)" , to tell someone to call it, and seek mental help (since they probably do tbh).

Guy 1: What were you doing? It's been like 6 hours!.

Guy 2: Jacking off to changed rule 34.

Guy 1: I'm calling the police and the fucking FBI to throw yo horny ass in the slammer.
Guy 1: Bouta fuckin teach this degenerate nigga ass mothafucka some goddamn justice.

I'm calling the police by Adolf Hitler and Joseph Stalin September 20, 2023

I'm calling the police

Saying this in the hood is a reliable way to get yourself killed.

Gangsta: yo tryna cop this fat sack?
Snitch: I'm calling the police!
Gangsta: scuse me mothafucka?
Snitch: yeah you hea-
*Gunshots*

I'm calling the police by СукаБлять December 9, 2023

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If you text me or comments been limited again, I will report to police and crazy don from ITE COLLEGE WEST. I’m just 23 years old migrate.

If you text me or comments been limited again, I will report to police and crazy don from ITE COLLEGE WEST. I’m just 23 years old migrate. by sdinaz October 25, 2023

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leafers

NYC people who migrate north to Quahog, RI to see the leaves in the fall.

New York and everyone from there can fornicate themselves with an iron stick.

leafers by ss++ February 8, 2005

Word of the Day on September 27, 2026

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Respectfully

Precedes or follows either a gratuitously disrespectful or honest remark, originated in New York City. Used in similar fashion to "no offense" or "to be honest," interchangeably.

Ya mans is wild buns, respectfully. Respectfully he's washed.

After school, The Modells on Jamaica Ave was active. Respectfully.

Respectfully by john quan the first December 20, 2020

Word of the Day on September 26, 2026

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You met me at a very Chinese time in my life

A moment in time where you feel distinctly Chinese over all other things.

Dante: "I wish I could be Nigerian, but I can't because I'm Chinese. You met me at a very Chinese time in my life."

You met me at a very Chinese time in my life by Sus Chad September 21, 2026

Word of the Day on September 25, 2026

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crunchy

Adjective. Used to describe persons who have adjusted or altered their lifestyle for environmental reasons. Crunchy persons tend to be politically strongly left-leaning and may be additionally but not exclusively categorized as vegetarians, vegans, eco-tarians, conservationists, environmentalists, neo-hippies, tree huggers, nature enthusiasts, etc.

Also used to describe establishments where alternative foods and products are sold, i.e. natural food stores.

Modified derivative of granola.

"I need more crunchy guys in my life. I'm so tired of dating preppy metrosexual assholes."

"I'm heading out to the crunchy store to pick up some fair trade chocolate and tea tree oil, do you need anything?"

crunchy by EBC July 11, 2007

Word of the Day on September 24, 2026

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Galantir

A group of people, typically women, searching through someone’s digital footprint in order to find more information about that person.

Susie wasn’t sure if her new Hinge match was a creep, so she assembled Galantir and they found out he used to post slurs on gaming forums.

Galantir by Ge-sus September 22, 2026

Word of the Day on September 23, 2026

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murderhobo

In a tabletop game, a murderhobo is a player who murders NPCs indiscriminately. This is normally derogatory, referring to a player who totally ignores quests, dialog, backstory, trade, world building etc.

The term is most common with Dungeons and Dragons, but it can be applied to most RPGs where the player is allowed to kill most quest-giving NPCs and NPC traders. E.g. Elder Scrolls, Fallout, Divinity original sin.

DM: The sad little orphan girl tugs at Steve's trenchcoat to get his attention, and ask for help saving her pet dog from...
Steve: I'd like to roll a strength check against strangling the orphan.
Dave: I call dibs on the dog.
DM: You murderhobos disgust me.

murderhobo by Loup&S September 9, 2021

Word of the Day on September 22, 2026

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