Building a system of pulleys and winches with a rope and noose attached. Then, waiting for your girlfriend/boyfriend to walk through the door, ambush, and smack them over the head with a frying pan. Then, putting the pulley and winch arrangement into effect, hanging your partner up as they start to awaken from the blow to the head. While they are hanging by their neck, you get an erection and when they are just about to die as a result of asphyxiation, quickly drop them and bum them.