First Night

noun, misnomer: A national family oriented celebration beginning on New Year's Eve (Last night of the old year.) and ending by 12:30 am New Year's Day (First morning of the new year.), in cities and towns across the US. Created by social conservatives as a drug free, alcohol free and sex free alternative to human pleasure.

normal person: Excuse me sir, can you assist me?

First Nighter: Certainly. What do you need?

normal person: I need five hits of ecstasy, two Asian hookers, and a bottle of Champagne.

First Nighter: This is a family event. Check your liberal coat at the door.

normal person: I apologize for interrupting your NAMBLA rally. My bad.

by Cunty Fresh Fanatic November 25, 2010

Flag

Get the First Night mug.

First Night Gangsterism

First heard on MTV's "World of Jenks". Term created by the rapper Maino. It goes something like this: You meet a girl for the first time. Take her back to her home or hotel and “give her the penetration of life”

Man 1: I'm taking you out on the town tonight for the first time. I wanna see some First Night Gangsterism.

Man 2: What?

Man 1: You gotta meet a girl for the first time. Take her back to her home or hotel and give her the penetration of life.

by KillahCam0719 September 13, 2010

Flag

Get the First Night Gangsterism mug.

First Night Fever

When you are away from home on a multi day piss trip and it's been ages since you have caught up for good session on the nozzle. You go that hard that a 6 can beer bong is a breeze and you think that it's a great idea to follow it up by drinking rum out of a shoe as a chaser wearing underwear on your head. Next minute you are blind drunk, lost, naked, shit yourself and kicking down a door of the girls dorm on Fraser Island waving your dick around whilst the park ranger is searching for you.

Damn I'm hungover, we were only going to have two beers... fucken first night fever.

by ContractorLyfe June 27, 2017

Flag

Get the First Night Fever mug.

Night-before-first-day-of-school syndrome

That feeling when you can't sleep the night before the first day of school

Guy 1: ugh i can't fall asleep and its 12:20

Guy 2: Seems he's got Night-before-first-day-of-school syndrome

by Redsoxsuck04 August 6, 2014

Flag

Get the Night-before-first-day-of-school syndrome mug.

St Kilda Beach late at night on a first date

When you're on a first date with this guy you met online who you kept fobbing off because you were too busy/tired/off with other unimpressionable tools, and after trollololing together you start making out on St Kilda beach like a really classy clungey whore and get very very randy... and these foreigners come and start sight seeing of and all around you and your dick bag of a date just as you're beginning not to care whose looking because you just want to get raped in public not even in the bushes. Except you don't and go home because you have to get up for work at 6am.

"Hey Emily, I was kissing a boy on St Kilda beach late at night on a first date and could've had some good rape or gone back to his for rape but I have a shitty shitty job at 7am on a Sunday morning!!!"

"Lucky coq then St Kilda Beach late at night on a first date? Dick yeah!!"

"Hey slappa I had sand all up in my clunge when I got home!"

"Blue balled? Me too."

by Karen the Dyke February 9, 2012

Flag

Get the St Kilda Beach late at night on a first date mug.

The First Guy to Own A Nightclub

The most recent installment in Ryan George's "The first guy" series on YouTube. Go watch all of them. They're funny. He's a fantastic comedian. He does "pitch meetings" which used to be on Screen Rant. Has a bunch of other skits. It's good. Check it out.

Hym "Hey, the first guy to own a nightclub! Hilarious! It's Chris! Look, Chris! It's you! Kill yourself you piece of shit! I revolutionized A.I. and you interview sophists and charlatans! Who is it that actually sucks! I get credit for even half of the things I've done and I immediately make more money then you will ever have in you life and if I don't get credit I'll stab some kids! No amount of improvement accomplishes for you what I've accomplished. Do it today! Kill yourself today! You're literally expendable! Kill yourself Chris!"

by Hym Iam February 7, 2024

Flag