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Crochety

When something is really bad, it is crochety.
Dude, this burger tastes crochety!
by hahadaha September 10, 2012
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crochet

The art of making tablecloths, doilies, afghans, blankets out of yarn. Similar to knitting but with only 1 "needle" called a crochet hook.
My Mom did crochet Lots! She made dozens & dozens of afghans for family & as gifts & for newborn babies.
by Starchylde May 30, 2016
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crotchety

An adjective used to describe an old person. More specifically, someone who seems to hate life in their "golden years" and feels the need to take it out on others. These are the people that should be sent into the surface of the sun.
Look at that crotchety old bastard! He sure is mean!
by Dew-Driver June 27, 2005
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crochet-ming

The act of someone with skills in the art of crochet applying a high level of scrutiny to the work of others, mainly knitters, but occasionally fellow crocheters, or the product produced by these people.
Wife: Look at her sorry excuse for a slouchy hat. The stitch is wrong, the pattern is bad, the wrong hook size was used and the yarn is acrylic.

Me: You're crochet-ming again.
by itchymonkey April 6, 2016
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crochet

something slut buckets do to pass their miserable, pointless hours. a time-consuming, life-wasting endeavor. often passed off as a "creative" activity. boring, stupid, kill yourself right now. (i'm kidding)
1. No, I'm sorry, I can't go to the Bob Dylan concert with you because I've gotta stay home and crochet. I'm way behind.

2. Dude, where's my crochet hook?

3. Get yo' bitch ass off da phone and back to crochetin'!

4. Oh my God, I didn't know Michael Stipe was gay. I'm gonna go home and crochet.

5. My grandmother sits outside the Cracker Barrel and crochets and yells at kids and she hates them because they're young and she remembers when she was young and how much more interesting her life was back then.
by M. Stewart March 24, 2003
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gnat's crochet

gnat's balls
the width of a gnat's crochet, Within a gnat's crotchet.
Well known saying on British radio Game Show, 'I'm Sorry I haven't a Clue'
by Wireman2018 January 12, 2018
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crotchety

grumpy, bitchy, cow-faced, describing an old person
Drive faster you crotchety old lady!
by crazyaly July 1, 2005
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