Consterbation 

A person who conserves energy while masturbating so he or she can masturbate more later.

David focused on his consterbation carefully, anticipating many future masturbatory emissions in his not so distant future.

Consterbation by Squirrelywolf October 10, 2018

Consterbation 

Consternation brought on solely by ones own actions and self-inflicted misfortune.

Steve suffered terrible consterbation because he was too lazy to get his taxes done on time.

Consterbation by Gordon LP March 26, 2008

Conservation of ninjutsu 

A law of the Universe, that states that there is a finite amount of ninjutsu available to each side during any given battle. If there are many ninjas, they are all awarded a fraction of the total ninjutsu, or 1/N where N is the number of ninjas present in the fight.

This is the reason why hordes of ninja warriors will be dispatched relatively easily, whereas the lone ninja is almost unstoppable.

Practical applications of the law of Conservation of ninjutsu:

Sir! There's an army of ninjas heading this way!

Don't worry, we can take them.

Oh wait... it seems they've given up, sir. There's only one guy.

GOD DAMN IT RUN!

Conservation of ninjutsu by Kirbytroid June 5, 2011

conservation of greatness

Usually used in sports related situations (but also applicable to all life situations), conservation of greatness describes a situation where a person has just done something earth shatteringly amazing, and then immediately proceeds to attempt another amazing action. The second action has 1% chance of doubling the glory, and a 99% chance of failure, which includes a 50% chance of making the person look like an absolute fool.

Popularly used in the game of ultimate frisbee, but possibly originating elsewhere.

'Conservation of greatness' is rarely used as part of a statement, but instead is the entire statement, said after witnessing the the failed follow up action.

Said with great joy when an opposing team fails to compensate for conservation of greatness, but with utter frustration when your own team mate has just made a fool of himself.

conservation of greatness by Edgar R Pagan December 19, 2005

Law of Conservation of Happiness

One of the several laws of life that states that in order for one to attain a state of happiness, another must become unhappy.

Chief was having a bad day. In order to fill his happiness bag, he decided it best to make the division stay late to take inventory of everything in the shop.

Further proof of the Law of Conservation of Happiness...

Law of Conservation of Happiness by 7h0rn3 August 17, 2009

consternation 

shocked dismay: a feeling of alarm, confusion, or dismay, often caused by something unexpected

The news caused worldwide consternation and a panic on the stock exchange.

consternation by Oyat April 25, 2006

Crysterbation 

Crying whist masturbating.

Mike was so upset that his girlfriend cheated on him that he spent the entire night crysterbating while listening to The Cure.

Larry is really into crysterbation, especially since his wife left him.

Crysterbation by Jizzonneh December 12, 2007