Jens's Constant 

The result when summing all the divisors of the numbers from 1 to 9. Seems to be a fundamental constant of nature, since it occurs many times on the Internet.

Youtube Poll:
69% yes
31% yesn't
Jens's Constant, nice ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

Jens's Constant by sevenfour March 2, 2021

Hubert's Constant 

The length from the foot of a bar stool to the nearest support. Has an effect on how far the stool's leg can be inserted into somebody's ass. Part of an equation explaining how many gay men a bar stool can support whilst upside-down. This number is derived from the depth of a man's ass named "Hubert". This number is approximately "2.167 feet", "0.660502 meters", or "26.004 inches."

Can all four of us sit on that stool? Let's see if it meets Hubert's Constant.

Hubert's Constant by Inevitibility June 6, 2015

Higginbotham's Constant

Higginbotham's Constant (denoted as lower-case 'h') is a mathematical constant which represents the total sum of all practical intelligence on any given planet.

The implication is that the higher the population of sentient beings on the planet, the lower the average intelligence will be among any large sample set. This does not preclude beings of higher intellect, but it requires that on average, there is one person as far below average as the former being is above average.

Person 1: "Why does it seem like the people staffing the company helpdesk get dumber every day?"
Person 2: "Higginbotham's Constant in action, my friend..."

Person 1: "I was on jury duty the other day. Have you seen what the trash of society wears into a courtroom? How has society lost so much respect for anyone and anything else in just a few decades?"
Person 2: "Higginbotham strikes again..."

Higginbotham's Constant by ComputerKurt May 18, 2010

planck's constant 

It relates to the energy in one quantum of electromagnetic radiation to the frequency of that radiation.
It is 6.62607004 × 10-34 m2 kg / s

Dustin : do you know planck's constant ?
Suzie: do you know the earth orbits the sun?
Dustin: So I know it starts with two sixes and then uh what is it...?
Suzie: okay let me just be clear on this. I havent heard from you in a while and now you want a mathematical equation that you should know so you can... save the world?
Dustin: Suzie-poo I promise I will make it up to you as soon as possible.
Suzie: you could make it up to me now
Dustin:what?
Suzie: I want to hear it
Dustin : not right now!
Suzie: yes now Dusti-bun!
Dustin: Suzie-poo this is urgent!!
Suzie: yes yes youre saving the world I heard you the first time but dennis is also saving earth sea and he is about to confront the shadow so this is suzie signing off.
Dustin: wait wait wait okay okay. ..okay
Dustin: aaa shit...

(starts singing never ending story)

Suzie: Planck's constant is 6.62607004

planck's constant by yougotmeweak July 10, 2019

Murphy's Constant 

Facts that are led by the most of Murphy's Law all at once and you know that, but even so you know nothing can be done to prevent that other than falling into ANOTHER Murphy's Constant.

1. When I looked out the window, sky was so cloudy and as dark as tar, so I decided to carry my umbrella with me. Following the Murphy's Constant, a punch of wind has just blown all those dark clouds away, suddenly. Then I had to keep my umbrella in hands during the whole sunny and hot day. That, untill I realized I forgot it somewhere. And guess what?! Without my umbrella with me, when I was in the wide open center of the city, miles way from home, making my way back home on foot, since I lost my bus, that hot and brighty sunlight turned back into a gloomy, and even darker mass of clouds than before and the whaterfalls poured all upon me, until I arrived home, closed the door behind my backs and that shiny sun appeared again. Plus during that storm, occured a power outage...
But if I didn't carry my umbrella when I was leaving home, rain would have started right at that moment, I would get to work all wet, and that bright sunlight would have been shining while I was inside that closed building and with my umbrella with... Just happened MILLION times with me... that's one of my Murphy's Constants!

Murphy's Constant by WondererCarvalho August 3, 2010

Ferdinand's Constant 

A fake math term that you can use to piss off your teacher.

*teacher writes some boring ass equation*
Teacher: So what's the answer?
Student: Ferdinand's Constant.
Teacher: Fuck you.

Ferdinand's Constant by herro98 May 22, 2018

Alex's Constant

A theory postulated pertaining to the size and elasticity of the female vaginal opening wherein the size of the the vaginal opening at the caudal end of the vulva is set at puberty and can be used to predict the wieght of the woman in middle age.
In lay terms, a girl grows into the size of her vagina which is the same at puberty independent of outside stimuli.

In normal terms, a pussy is what it is...loose or tight. It doesnt prove theyre a whore and doesn't prove they're not. It's luck. A bitch grows into it, wideset = a future fat mama. Tight = a future milf.

Person 1: "Dude! I fit four fingers inside Sally last night!"
Person 2: "Bro, according to Alex's Constant look out that means she's turning into a 40 year old porker."

Alex's Constant by ThatGuyHasAHugePenis January 17, 2011