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Captain Oblivious

A person, often otherwise intelligent, who routinely exhibits a comical lack of understanding in social situations.

Such a person is typically well-known for their repeated well-meaning tactlessness, failure to notice romantic overtures, tendency to walk into doorknobs and general forgetfulness.
"Blunt!"
"Cheerful!"
"Clumsy!"
"Absentminded!"
"Negative square root of two!"

By your powers combined, I am... Captain Oblivious!
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Captain Obvious

a sarcastic name for someone who states the obvious
Cat: "The sky is blue"
Rich: "Thanks, Captain Obvious"
Captain Obvious by Breezy April 13, 2004

Thanks Captain Obvious 

Thanks Captain obvious is the appropriate response to someone who says something blatantly obvious. This can be said kindly and in jest to one’s friends or spitefully to the jerk that’s been irritating you.
Me: Did you hear in the news about the girl who jumped off of a bridge after leaving a note to her family?
BFF: She must have been suicidal
Me: Thanks captain obvious!

"Thank you Captain Obvious" 

A phrase generally used to indicate that someone, i.e. Captain Obvious, has just uttered something that everyone can see. Of course, this statement is usually uttered by someone who is only bright enough to see obvious things.

Thank you Captain Obvious

A phrase said to a dumbass who answers a rhetorical question or states the obvious.
Guy: Where did he come from?
Dumbass: His mother.

captain obvious

A very slow-witted individual, usually one who states the most obvious thing.
A: Hey, water's wet!
B: Good call, Captain Obvious!
captain obvious by Clarissa June 21, 2003

thank you captain obvious

What you reply to someone who has just said something completely stupid and obvious.
Joe: Wow it sure is hot here in the desert huh?
Tom: Well thank you captain obvious...
thank you captain obvious by puje November 11, 2009