A Hostage Situation 

When a couple is on a date and you can tell it's a blind date or guilt induced by how mismatched the pair are. It makes for a really uncomfortable situation.

I went out with Ron because I didn't know he was considering it a date. All night, people kept looking at me funny like it was a hostage situation.
Honesty: "I can't go out with you because it'll look like a hostage situation."

A Hostage Situation by MadamexXx March 3, 2009

A hostage situation

That I did not create. You CHOSE a hostage situation. You chose the dystopian harassment for ME even if it is only happening to me (which it isn't and if the impact has lessened that's another thing for which I'm not being given credit) you CHOSE that and now YOU WANT ME to chose... The thing YOU want to happen. You want me to chose to walk away emptyhanded without you having to interact with me and then never retaliate for the rest of my life. DO I OWE YOU A FAVOR, BITCH!? ARE WE FRIENDS!? WHY WOULD I DO ANYTHING FOR YOU!? Do you want me to drive your pregnant wife to the hospital for you too? You need a babysitter? How about a foot-rub? That is how HE thinks at a fundamental level! I'm here to serve him and when he steals from me, I also need to make the choices he wants me to make. I'm his servant! That's what it is. I'm doing this guy favors because I owe him something. I either murder kids are his discretion or he locks me up for an "unsanctioned child murder." You got the SANCTIONED ones where he orders a drone strike on you house and then you go the UNSANCTIONED ones where they steal a guys dissertation and that guy stabs a little girl to death in a gas station because what, are you never going to bring your kids to a gas station? THAT is one of the unsanctioned one. So HERE I got to make an appeal to get my child murder sanction by the government.

Hym "And the appeals process is a NIGHTMARE because they just bark the things you say back at you like a parrot. You almost need to carry crackers around I your pocket. And we are just best friends all of us. But usually to get sanctioned you need to get fired explicitly for murder but I just designed the AI they are going to use to make your lives dystopian nightmares. And really it's racist! If I was a JEW... HE WOULD HAND ME THE GUN AND PAT ME ON THE BACK! And then he would GIVE ME A BILLION DOLLARS for the inconvenience of making me have to walk a couple of steps to grab the money from them. It really is absurd. It's almost unbelievable that a hostage situation doesn't work on the Jews! You'd think the would just be like 'Oh god no! Please! Take my kids instead! Here! Here are the keys to my house and car! Don't forget my wallet sir!' Heheheh... JooOooOoooOoos!"

A hostage situation by Hym Iam November 11, 2025

hungry as a hostage in a holdup situation 

When you believe that your hunger is a equivalent to that of a hostage who has been kidnapped by a terrorist or a bankrobber, without food or drink.

We better get some food now, I'm hungry as a hostage in a holdup situation

hungry as a hostage in a holdup situation by Tim Douglass February 19, 2008

sans sheriff 

Lawless use of fonts or typography, with no regard to aesthetics or legibility

I'm putting this CV straight in the bin. Written totally sans sheriff.

sans sheriff by Jamarley July 3, 2019

Breadhead 

Someone who is addicted to obtaining money and building wealth. A money addict and fanatic. Breadheads often work more than one full-time job, and some even participate in illicit activities to "obtain the bread".

A breadhead is like a crackhead, but for money instead of crack.

Breadhead by 🅱️ U S 3 4 8 March 30, 2022

Stink lines

As seen in illustrations or cartoons: Wavy, vertical lines rising above a person, place or thing. Denotes a foul odor.

"You didn't put enough stink lines on your picture of the teacher."

Stink lines by Athene Airheart March 14, 2004

schmegegge 

Yiddish slang word meaning bullshit, baloney, hogwash, nonsense, crock of shit or hot air.

I don't buy the schmegegge about Morty sleeping with Moira.
His version of the story was pure schmegegge.
The whole schmegegge was made up to get Liz a little bit of attention.

schmegegge by budsbabe February 1, 2008