Popcorn hands

n. Large, cauliflower-shaped phalanges, ill-suited for use during intercourse.

Hey, Angie... check out the set of popcorn hands on that guy.

by Oscar's Mom June 13, 2008

hand wanding

An act used for manually penetrating an orifice for the purposes of pre lubrication prior to penetration via a limb, specially a hand, knuckle, finger, wrist or elbow... consent is a must for this activity...

Man, I’d love to give her a strong hand wanding, right up to the elbow...

by HandWander69 October 10, 2018

hand slamming

Intense and at times, violent masturbation.

"OMG I walking into the house and caught my sister hand slamming herself, my eyes will never be the same again."

by Daikaiju February 22, 2015

hand cream

That infamous post jerk-off semen on your hand that you don't quite know what to do with.

Johnny- Hurry up in there Brandon, we have to go.
Brandon- Give me a break Johnny, I've got a fist full of hand cream in here and nowhere to wipe it! Jeez!

by The Ugly Barnacle February 27, 2015

Museum Hands

When a person's hands get covered in cum resulting in being unable to touch anything, much like in a museum.

I couldn't turn the doorknob to get out of her bedroom because I had museum hands.

by Director October 23, 2014

Highlighter's Hand

Hand cramping and spams from excessive highlighting and writing; seen most at the start of the school year after summer break.

"Chemistry has so many notes, I've got highlighter's hand now."

by MadisonOne August 28, 2009

carny hands

people, generally men, who have freakishly small hands.

Josh's carny hands freak me out, they are way too small, freakish!

by Vanelle March 3, 2009