National Jerk Off Day

December 1st is a holiday for all the brave boys and men who fought through their urges throughout No Nut November! It’s a celebration of what they accomplished and what they will do during Destroy Dick December!

National Jerk Off Day is on December 1st! A celebration of what’s accomplished during No Nut November!!

by FlareHC October 18, 2019

No Jerk Off July

No Jerk Off July is July, but no jerking off. You can use other ways to shoot hot steaming cum all over your mechanical keyboard, just don't jerk off. Only real men can do this.

Obama: Ah yes, time to jerk off to Michelle's feet.

Tyrone: Hol' up. You can't jerk off, it's No Jerk Off July!

Obama: Ah, right, I'll just rape her instead.

by IJerkOffDuringJuly November 4, 2019

Tequila Jerk-Knot

It starts as auto-erotic asphyxiation, then takes a turn once you add lime juice and salt to your member, proceeding by masturbating furiously.

Did you hear about Ryan? He's in the ER after a botched Tequila Jerk-Knot.

by sircocklord December 15, 2019

Heckel and Jeckel

Police Officers found in a "Black and White" or marked police car in crime infested neighborhoods that talk alot to street level dealers. Not to be trusted!!

Yo... heckel and jeckel said next time they see me out here they gonna run my pockets and lock my a** up.

Dude they took my stash last week and dropped me off on them docks all fu**ed up. dem boys is Grimey.

by 0roburos February 8, 2013

as right as my jerk hand

Confirmation/acceptance of something, referring to the speakers handedness for masturbation.

Brenda: You said we’re meeting at 1:30 for coffee, right?
Samuel: You’d be as right as my jerk hand with that.

by wordfanagler January 2, 2019

jerk sock

a sock that when guys are jerking off they (jizz) in it so it wont be on the curtains, carpet, bed or couch.

i had to flush my jerk sock because my mom came into the bathroom

by symple jack January 10, 2009

Facebook Jerk

The act of treating facebook as a pornographic medium through which one finds sexual pleasure, often committing the sin of masturbation.

Mark: Omg did you see Jamie's new vacation album. I swore in one picture you could see her butt crack
Tom: Facebook Jerk!

by MH Lazarus January 18, 2008