uptard

verb- the act of making something worse in an inept attempt to make it better, usually by adding unnecessary, useless, and/or ridiculous elements

Jim's $500 Honda station wagon was uptarded when he added the whale-tail spoiler.

uptard by ChinkJew May 15, 2005

uptard

(тормоз по русски, if anyone reads Russian here):

a person who is neither retarded nor mentally challenged nor eccentric, but in their normal state (i.e without being UTI) is still slow on the uptake.

boy: Melissa, when is your birthday again?

girl: my name is not Melissa, it's Melanie, and are you lol an uptard? I know you are normal because you get amazing grades in chemistry and physics. my birthday, for the last time, is March 15, but you always give me flowers on March 9.

boy: I am not an uptard. Due to family tradition, i can't possibly give a girl flowers on The Ides of March, even if it's her birthday.

Melanie: are you telling me your limo is triple parked?

boy: no.

uptard by Uncle Dimma February 16, 2013

uptard

Being uptarded. Haha. This means that one is a little more retarded than just a normal retard and thus achieving the status of "uptard."

People add words to the urbandictionary without defining them are uptards.

uptard by Douchebag March 26, 2004

Uptard

1. To act in a manner of one level higher than a retard. 2. To give less than adequate effort causing a poor result.

Cody proved he was an uptard by tripping over himself catching a baseball.

Uptard by ljlongboarder August 18, 2003

uptard

(тормоз по русски)

a person who is neither retarded nor mentally challenged nor eccentric, but in their normal state (i.e without being UTI) is still slow on the uptake.

boy: Melissa, when is your birthday again?

girl: my name is not Melissa, it's Melanie, and are you lol an uptard? I know you are normal because you get amazing grades in chemistry and physics. my birthday, for the last time, is March 15, but you always give me flowers on March 9.

boy: I am not an uptard. both of the things you mentioned are correct; however, I have two cousins, identical twins, one named Melissa, the other Melanie, and you look like an older version of them. Numero Dos due to family tradition, i can't possibly give a girl flowers on The Ides of March, even if it's her birthday.

Melanie: are you telling me your limo is triple parked?

boy: no.

uptard by Uncle Dimma December 31, 2012

fail upwards 

To repeatedly get fired but consistently find a new job that are better than the one you just lost.

"She's never had a job for more than two years without geting canned and now she's a VP. I've never seen anyone fail upwards better than she does."

fail upwards by Eggsocket July 9, 2009

upturd 

when you hold back an impending crap long and hard enough that it actually creeps back upwards, buying you a little more time before either making it to a bathroom or shitting your pants

Carl suddenly had to take a shit on a floatplane but there was no bathroom, so he clenched up tight and forced an upturd.

upturd by walterc March 26, 2013