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unidexter
As used by Peter Cook in his 'One-legged Tarzan" sketch on "Not only ... But Also" in 1971
The scene is a theatrical producer's office (Peter Cook) and Dudley Moore plays the unidexter.
Peter:Miss Rigby! Stella, my love! Would you please send in the next auditioner, please. Mr. Spigott, I believe it is.
Enter Dudley, hopping energetically on one leg
Peter:Mr. Spigott, I believe?
Dudley:Yes — Spigott by name, Spigott by nature. (keeps hopping)
Peter:Yes... if you'd like to remain motionless for a moment, Mr. Spigott. Please be stood. Now, Mr. Spigott you are, I believe, auditioning for the part of Tarzan?
Dudley:Right.
Peter:Now, Mr. Spigott, I couldn't help noticing almost at once that you are a one-legged person.
Dudley:You noticed that?
Peter:I noticed that, Mr. Spigott. When you have been in the business as long as I have you come to notice these things almost instinctively. Now, Mr. Spigott, you, a one-legged man, are applying for the role of Tarzan — a role which, traditionally, involves the use of a two-legged actor.
Dudley:Correct.
Peter:And yet you, a unidexter, are applying for the role.
Dudley:Right.
Peter:A role for which two legs would seem to be the minimum requirement.
Dudley:Very true.
Peter:Well, Mr. Spigott, need I point out to you where your deficiency lies as regards landing the role?
Dudley:Yes, I think you ought to.
Peter:Need I say with overmuch emphasis that it is in the leg division that you are deficient.
Dudley:The leg division?
Peter:Yes, the leg division, Mr. Spigott. You are deficient in it — to the tune of one. Your right leg I like. I like your right leg. A lovely leg for the role. That's what I said when I saw you come in. I said ‘A lovely leg for the role.’ I've got nothing against your right leg. The trouble is — neither have you. You fall down on your left.
etc.
The scene is a theatrical producer's office (Peter Cook) and Dudley Moore plays the unidexter.
Peter:Miss Rigby! Stella, my love! Would you please send in the next auditioner, please. Mr. Spigott, I believe it is.
Enter Dudley, hopping energetically on one leg
Peter:Mr. Spigott, I believe?
Dudley:Yes — Spigott by name, Spigott by nature. (keeps hopping)
Peter:Yes... if you'd like to remain motionless for a moment, Mr. Spigott. Please be stood. Now, Mr. Spigott you are, I believe, auditioning for the part of Tarzan?
Dudley:Right.
Peter:Now, Mr. Spigott, I couldn't help noticing almost at once that you are a one-legged person.
Dudley:You noticed that?
Peter:I noticed that, Mr. Spigott. When you have been in the business as long as I have you come to notice these things almost instinctively. Now, Mr. Spigott, you, a one-legged man, are applying for the role of Tarzan — a role which, traditionally, involves the use of a two-legged actor.
Dudley:Correct.
Peter:And yet you, a unidexter, are applying for the role.
Dudley:Right.
Peter:A role for which two legs would seem to be the minimum requirement.
Dudley:Very true.
Peter:Well, Mr. Spigott, need I point out to you where your deficiency lies as regards landing the role?
Dudley:Yes, I think you ought to.
Peter:Need I say with overmuch emphasis that it is in the leg division that you are deficient.
Dudley:The leg division?
Peter:Yes, the leg division, Mr. Spigott. You are deficient in it — to the tune of one. Your right leg I like. I like your right leg. A lovely leg for the role. That's what I said when I saw you come in. I said ‘A lovely leg for the role.’ I've got nothing against your right leg. The trouble is — neither have you. You fall down on your left.
etc.
unidexter by Alan J. Heath September 3, 2007
unidextrous
unidextrous by khgrege February 14, 2009
Unisexform
Unisexform by OuluNussija July 5, 2009
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