a fecal structure that forms in port-a-potties and out-houses from repeated defecation where feces deposits pile in a mound like formation that extends upward resembling geologic stalagmite formations formed in limestone caves extending upward from the cavefloor.
Pete "Dude! Did you see the stalagshite in the backcountry out-house?!"
Nick "Oh my gosh, dude! The stalagshite was only inches away from touching my junk!"
Pronounced like "stalagmite", it's when you don't wipe your ass after taking a shit or wash your ass in the shower the shit starts to build up into what is known as "stalagshites".
The shit envelopes the hair around the asshole and fuses to it as well as the ass skin. It hardens over time, resulting in pillar-like spikes that protrude from one's ass. As you can imagine, stalagshites grow in size the longer your ass goes unwashed. In rate cases, they can reach all the way to the water in the toilet bowl, resulting in a blunting of the tips.
Example 1:
"I used to be part of a hippy group in the forests of Oregon. The free lifestyle was wonderful. However eventually the thick dreadlocks and stink of our stalagshites got the best of me and I decided to go back to my normal lifestyle."
Example 2:
"Marcus was a disgusting pig of a roommate. He never washed or wiped his asshole. One day while hopping over a wrought-iron fence, a spike snagged one of his stalagshites, ripping the hair and some of his ass skin from his asshole. After that, he started keeping his ass cleaner. "
when you're holding up your phone and making faces at it, as though you are taking a selfie, but you're really taking a picture of the person across from you or the wall or anything else that seems interesting but you don't want to be caught dead taking a picture of.
This action is often made more convincing by wiggling the eyebrows or opening the mouth, to pretend you're trying to get a Snapchat filter to work.
FRIEND A: "Did you just take a stealthie of me?"
FRIEND B (turning phone around): "no I was just using snapchat's new filter, see?"