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smegmometer

a device used to measure the amount of smegma build-up within the foreskin of an uncircumcised male penis
"Dude, can i borrow you smegmometer? I feel like it's starting to build."
"Yeah bro, it might be time for spring cleaning."
by Beta Rho January 26, 2009
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spermometer

Man: Can I stick my spermometer in your downstairs turkey, see how hot it is?
by Lizard_Queen July 12, 2007
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Smegmonster

An obese male or female who's genitals are so filthy they should probably be put through a car wash.
I'm going on a blind date tonight, I hope it doesn't turn out to be another Smegmonster!
by Brian The Snail March 18, 2013
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The Smegmonster

A Human like creature with a receding hairline and cheesy penis often seen drinking stella on field 3
Woah look moma it's the smegmonster!

Dont look it in the eye son you'll catch the bald.
by Fatlad95 March 29, 2019
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