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shemoose 

A closeted homosexual who lives at home in his late thirties, sells used cars to pay for his Barry Manilow Greatest Hits CD, and thinks 56 year old women who have had gastric bypass surgery are "very attractive."
Emoose1940: IM 37 AND I STILL WANT TO GRAB A STICK AND GO OUT IN THE BACK YARD AND PLAY ARMY,,, BANG,,,, BANG,,, BANG
shemoose by Davey February 8, 2005
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shemoose (italianus microphallus) 

An aging never was who believes that women in chatrooms find him "sexy",
he exists on playing eat the mud pie and mayonnaise sandwich with his neighbors 12 year old son. It has also been said that he funds his lifestyle by selling used cars and playing glory hole with his mother for 5 dollars a shot. His hobbies include slamming his ''big ITALIAN meat'' in a desk drawer to prove that tough guys don't cry and he ain't no pussy fag, and singing Barry Manilow karaoke while wearing a t shirt that reads " Beat me up I'm WICKED GAY!''
We regret that we cannot and will not give an example because it was just too fucking stupid to type.
Whenever you friend is late to the shindig you call them this. Often they are self centered and have a low iq.
Where the hell is shmoose he/she was supposed to be here 4 hours ago.
Shmoose by rsguy225 October 29, 2018

shemosexual 

1. A highly sexual creature that appears to be female, but will have sex with anything.
1. Shemosexual than most when she got that beerbottle up in her pussy.
shemosexual by drippindorf December 3, 2010

shmooser 

Someone who is being annoying or someone you just want to mess with. Just another thing to call someone that most people have never heard of. Instead of calling them something that might hurt thier feelings you call them a shmooser.
Your such a shmooser.
shmooser by Megan Loth April 8, 2006
1. To act like a celebrity at a party

2. The act of disliking jeb bush
1. I Shmoosed at the party we went to
2. Hey bill do you shmoose? Ye I do tom.
shmoose by Rey mysterifaggot February 4, 2016
My eggs got shmoosed :(
Shmoosed by Dockidd3r December 18, 2020