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Toilet Paper Work

Work that can only be done while taking a shit.
Steve jobs created the Iphone 6 while drinking his morning cup of coffee during Toilet Paper Work hour.
Toilet Paper Work by Zhall November 14, 2014

paperwork 

Court documents revealing what a prisoner's charges, criminal history, downward departures, etc. are. This is used to determine whether a person is a snitch, child molestor, or other kind of person considered undesirable by other prisoners. The Presentence Investigation Report is the gold standard of paperwork, because it tells everything that the probation officer was able to dig up about the prisoner's life, and details any assistance he may have rendered to the government; but prisoners are often forbidden to have it in their possession for that exact reason. At higher security prisons, people are often expected to show their paperwork within a certain period of time (e.g. a week or a month) or they'll be checked in to protective custody by their fellow prisoners.
"Lemme see your paperwork."
paperwork by Tochterlieber March 19, 2014

paperwork marriage

A marriage that is for the sole purpose of one or both of the participants to gain benefits that would not be available outside of marriage to each other--quite often for immigration or health insurance purposes as opposed to marrying for love/lust. Very common in the military as unmarried soldiers are required to live in the barracks.
Soldier 1: Man, I hate living in the barracks.
Soldier 2: If you got a paperwork marriage you wouldn't have to live in the barracks. Just keep your shit separate from hers and you're gold.
paperwork marriage by jepleure November 12, 2009

paperwork 

Wiping your ass with toilet paper after you take a shit.
I just had the shits. The paperwork took forever.
paperwork by Jeremy Gillespie April 25, 2004

Do a little paperwork 

Relocating to the bathroom(with printed material to read) to sit on the toilet awaiting production results, usually for an extended period of time.
Husband: Honey I'm going to do a little paperwork.

Wife: Hope everything works out OK.

paperwork 

To be engaged in the act of rolling a marijuana smoking apparatus ("blunt", "spliff", "joint").
Jims doing some paper work, and then we're going to smoke this fat-ass L.

Jim:Excuse me while I finish some paperwork.
paperwork by Wolf X Lax 22 July 19, 2010
More from Urban Dictionary

proper lad 

a lad that is such a lad that he is a proper lad
person1:did you see bob
person2: ya he was a proper lad
Word of the Day on October 29, 2026
The number of years you are still sexually active
While our lifespan is the number of years we will live, our healthspan is the number of healthy years we will have and our sexspan is is the number of years we will continue to be healthy enough to continue having an active sex life.
sexspan by Dr Kat April 21, 2022
Word of the Day on October 28, 2026
A lighthearted reaction upon receiving disappointing news of some sort. Usually something that isn't a particularly a big deal, esp. when it primarily affects someone else - sort of a mild schadenfreude. Sometimes doubled or tripled, and possibly said in a sing-songy voice for added comedic effect to imitate a muted trumpet, which is how the meme originated.
You didn't get any napkins with your takeout pork fried rice? Womp womp.
womp by 175623226 November 3, 2011
Word of the Day on October 27, 2026
When your wife’s boyfriend let you sleep past 8pm 😎😎
Wife’s boyfriend: You have 5 more minutes
Me: Poggers!
Poggers by Just_Charles April 14, 2020
Word of the Day on October 26, 2026

Oblication 

A vacation, feeling more like an obligation, that involves visiting or staying with family.
So Joe where are you taking the kids for spring break vacation? We are going on an oblication to Boca to visit my mother-in-law.
Oblication by kimmerr May 5, 2011
Word of the Day on October 25, 2026

Surf Dracula Syndrome 

A phenomenon in film/television series, most notably streaming series, where the main premise is drawn out to such a point that it takes an entire season or more to get the parts of the series the audience is actually interested in seeing.

For example, if a series is titled "Surf Dracula," a majority of viewers would tune in expecting to see Dracula surfing by the first or second episode. However, the entire first season would instead be tedious padding and backstory before finally ending with Dracula surfing in the last five minutes of the season finale.
I watched "Smallville" on Netflix the other day. Dude, it was ten seasons of filler before he finally flew! Major Surf Dracula Syndrome!
Word of the Day on October 24, 2026
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