muffin fucker 

One who wakes up early on saturday morning for the sole purpose of furiously eating (fucking) all of the oven fresh muffins before anyone else can. They also enjoy fucking carrot cake and banana bread.

Bill (to Steve): That J.V. is a muffin fucker extraordinaire.

Steve: It's 5:30AM, better get down stairs before all of those muffins get fucked.

muffin fucker by shiteater9000 April 14, 2010

Muffin Fucker 

muffin fucker (v): someone you offers to do something solid but ends up pussin out and being an overall bitch by not closing the deal

Teddy is a muffin fucker because he volunteered to DD us out to the lake but then decided to sleep there instead of driving home like a muffin fucking whore. he will also probably be a muffin fucker and eat all the muffins in the morning too

Muffin Fucker by Okonkwo12 May 9, 2011

Muffin Fucker 

muffin fucker (v): someone you offers to do something solid but ends up pussin out and being an overall bitch by not closing the deal

T-Co is a muffin fucker because he is going to DD us out to the lake but sleep there like a muffin fucking whore. he will also probably be a muffin fucker and eat all the muffins in the morning too.

Muffin Fucker by Okonkwo11 May 9, 2011

Muffin Fucker 

Someone who says they have done things, usually sexual things, that they have never actually don

Dude I talked to some people, turns out John never got head from her, he's such a Muffin Fucker

Muffin Fucker by No Mc January 17, 2008

Mutha Fucker Muffin Man 

a gay dude who is an extreme pervert that lives on drury lane.

Guy 1: "Bro, I heard that guy over there lives on drury lane."

Guy 2: "Yeah bro. I also heard him masturbating in the bathroom yesterday."

Guy 1: "He must be a Mutha Fucker Muffin Man."

Mutha Fucker Muffin Man by ShaquilleOatmeal_ March 16, 2022

Fuckberry Muffin 

For use when describing an especially attractive woman, whom you would like to have sexual intercourse with.

Joe- "Wow, look at that woman!"
Fred- "She looks like a damn fuckberry muffin."
Joe- "Indeed."

Fuckberry Muffin by fuck.berry.muffin. December 6, 2010

Muffinfucker 

Lit. someone who performs sexual acts on baked goods. Used to describe somebody with an obsession with baking they wont stop talking about. Also an alternative, mother-friendly term usable in place of "motherfucker" for most purposes.

No, I don't want to hear about your latest loaf of sourdough you absolute muffinfucker.

Muffinfucker by Smoogles March 14, 2021