A conflict in which two parties (ususally male) are vehemently disputing something of limited relevance. Generally, both parties are somewhat wrong, but each refuses to be back down for fear of being thought the have the smaller of their two penises. Similar to a pissing match, but generally, the conflict involved involves a larger element of machismo, and continues on only because neither side wants to be seen as the one who backs down.

The White House and the Conservative Right have been in a real dick measuring contest over the qualifications of this new Supreme Court apointee, Harriet Meiers.

dick measuring contest by Cosmo October 12, 2005

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Dick Measuring

When to men are talking, and one trys to one up the other by bragging.

Bill: Ok I shot sniper 1 down and am working on 2.
Ted: Well I killed that one guy back there, remember?
Bill: Now's not the time for Dick Measuring!

Dick Measuring by jlong17543 August 2, 2009

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Equator Penis Measuring System

The Equator Penis Measuring System (EPMS) is the system that gives an approximation of one's penis size. Generally speaking, the closer you live to the Ecuador, the larger your penis is. For example, Africans and Latin Americans living on the equator will have penises measuring around 11 or 12 inches hard, while the English and Scottish living up north have penises measuring 3 inches flaccid, or up to 5 inches hard. There are also intermediate points. Italians, for example, have penises about 6 inches flaccid, and 8 inches hard.

Example of the Equator Penis Measuring System

Canadian: Eh, my penis is aboot 3 inches.

Italian: What's a matta you, uh?? I got a 8 inch sausage! It could slap you and break-a your face!!

Black guy: Y'all niggas is small. I got 12 inches up in this muthafucka. Y'all my bitches now. SHIT JUST GOT REAL!!! SHIT JUST GOT REAL!!!

Equator Penis Measuring System by rogerthewhale March 8, 2013

stealth measuring

exploiting mechanics to measure distances in a table top war game where one is not allowed to check distances freely

We said no stealth measuring! If you want to measure before every action go play 10th Edition!

stealth measuring by IamMeWasTaken April 2, 2023

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Dick Measuring Contest

When people obsessively compare themselves to each other to see who is 'the best' or 'the biggest'. It may or may not involve actual penises, but it can. Usually the things being compared are worthless and meaningless things like income, car size, house size, job performance, sports stats, partner attractiveness, and yes, of course, penis sizes.

They're all bragging about how big their cars are versus the other guy's car, they're just engaging in a useless dick measuring contest.

Dick Measuring Contest by suburban__dictionary August 20, 2023

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kinktober

An excuse for people to write porn with different types of kinks throughout the month of October.

Smut Fanfiction

That chick doesn't write often but when she does, its for Kinktober.

kinktober by Kinkiest July 12, 2018

Word of the Day on October 30, 2026

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proper lad

a lad that is such a lad that he is a proper lad

person1:did you see bob
person2: ya he was a proper lad

proper lad by its_ya_boi_chips_ahoy May 20, 2018

Word of the Day on October 29, 2026

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sexspan

The number of years you are still sexually active

While our lifespan is the number of years we will live, our healthspan is the number of healthy years we will have and our sexspan is is the number of years we will continue to be healthy enough to continue having an active sex life.

sexspan by Dr Kat April 21, 2022

Word of the Day on October 28, 2026

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womp

A lighthearted reaction upon receiving disappointing news of some sort. Usually something that isn't a particularly a big deal, esp. when it primarily affects someone else - sort of a mild schadenfreude. Sometimes doubled or tripled, and possibly said in a sing-songy voice for added comedic effect to imitate a muted trumpet, which is how the meme originated.

You didn't get any napkins with your takeout pork fried rice? Womp womp.

womp by 175623226 November 3, 2011

Word of the Day on October 27, 2026