suburban__dictionary's definitions

Suicided

The act of killing someone and framing their death to make it seem like they killed themselves, rather than, in reality, them getting murdered by someone. Most notable examples of this include Jeffrey Epstein and John McAfee, who were both taken out by the government. Both individuals had insiders notifying others on the internet that they would be 'suicided' minutes before their deaths.

Adam: "Wow, John McAfee just killed himself by hanging... I can't believe he would do such a thing, poor guy. I can't imagine the depression he was going through to get to that point."
Josh: "Yeah, as if.... You know for a fact that the government suicided him. You think a dude like that would be suicidal or depressed? No, they faked his death. He even tweeted out that he was going to be suicided right before it happened, for fucks sake."

by suburban__dictionary September 3, 2022

Simp

Simps (short for 'sucka idiolizing mediocre pussy', or for female simps, 'sucka idiolizing mediocre penis') are people that devote an unhealthy amount of attention to a potential mate in hopes of validation or rewards from said person, rather than being themselves and accepting rejection if the other person is not interested. Simps will do anything for any potential mate to gain their approval, even if the person does not reciprocate. This is unfortunately the case for many simps; their potential mates usually take no interest in the simp, and if they do, it is only because the simp rewards them for simply existing.

Contrary to popular belief, the act of simping is not associated with being attracted to a mate, taking interest in and attempting to date a mate, or being friendly to a potential mate.

How it's properly used:
Jaden: "I've given her all my money, I text her every single night even though she leaves me on read, I massage her feet constantly, and she still doesn't want to date me yet! Maybe I should keep picking up her food for her, maybe then she'll decide to get with me."
Mason: "Are you sure this girl is even interested in you in the first place? I think you're being a bit of a simp, you need to just be yourself and find a girl that loves you for who you are."

How it's improperly used:
Jack: "That girl is cute. Maybe I should ask her out. No big deal if she says no, it's just worth a shot."
Joe: "You're such a simp."
Jack: "Okay, so even though the purpose of our species is to procreate and find a mate, I am a simp for pursuing that. Correct?"
Joe: "Yah."
Jack: "Okay.. cool. Guess I will never ever talk to another female as long as I live, despite the fact that our purpose is to procreate. Gotcha. Sounds like a plan. Noted. Will do."

by suburban__dictionary May 3, 2023

Pubstomping

When one or more highly skilled players play on unranked public matches or community servers against far less skilled players, completely and utterly dominating them with high kills.

"Whoa, that dude got 150 kills and 0 deaths that match, he's totally pubstomping."

by suburban__dictionary February 10, 2024

3 years, 3000 devs

A statement people say when they are frustrated with the lack of content or game-breaking bugs/glitches in Call of Duty: Modern Warfare II (2022). The statement is a reference to the amount of time spent working on the game (3 years) and the amount of developers who worked on the game (3000). People use the phrase in mockery of the fact that even after 3 long years of the game's development, with a massive amount of 3000 developers putting time into developing the game, it still manages to be a horribly broken, unfinished, and incomplete mess.

- In response to game-glitches -
*MWII hard-crashes and reboots Jeff's computer*
Jeff: ... are you serious? 3 years, 3000 devs, and this shit wasn't fixed by them?

- In response to lack of content -
*MWII releases only one new map and 2 new guns for the newest season*
Eric: Only one map for the entire season, and it's just a remake?!? 3 years, 3000 devs, and they still can't even pump out at least 4 maps per season?!?!

by suburban__dictionary June 7, 2023

Go Touch Grass

A phrase said to League of Legends players and many internet-goers in general; used as an insult to indicate that a person needs to stop spending so much time on the computer and get a life outside of it.

Friend: I just got Challenger in League!! It only took like 5 years of me playing the game for 8 hours straight every single day!!!
Me: That's awesome!!! Now that you've got that all finished up, you should go outside and go touch grass for the first time in fucking forever, you degenerate loser!

by suburban__dictionary May 27, 2022

Dick Measuring Contest

When people obsessively compare themselves to each other to see who is 'the best' or 'the biggest'. It may or may not involve actual penises, but it can. Usually the things being compared are worthless and meaningless things like income, car size, house size, job performance, sports stats, partner attractiveness, and yes, of course, penis sizes.

They're all bragging about how big their cars are versus the other guy's car, they're just engaging in a useless dick measuring contest.

by suburban__dictionary August 20, 2023

Git Gud

An unconstructive phrase used by 500 lb. 4chan dwellers that is used as a way to make fun of lower skilled players in video games without actually providing any positive ways for said lower-skilled player to 'git gud'. It is less of a phrase meant towards positive intention of lifting someone up and helping them 'getting good', and more of a phrase of superiority used by virgins to prove that the 24 hours they spend per day in their room practicing a game is paying off and is worthwhile.

Mark: "Dude I suck at this game! How the hell can I get better at it?"
Melvin: "Just git gud man. Ez pz u suck lol. I'm better than you, you're trash, delete the game lolz you'll never be good at it."
Mark: "Wow, well that's pretty helpful. Thank you for answering my question so respectfully and constructively. That gave me a lot of deep insight on how I can improve at the game."

by suburban__dictionary January 13, 2023