masturhate

A portmanteau of masturbate and hate. To hate something or someone so much as to masturbate and ejaculate on them.
I hated the school paper so much I rolled it up and masturhated on it.
by hograndax March 16, 2009
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masturhate

to masturbate and cry while experiencing intense feelings of self-loathing and depression. Generally done in a corner of a dark room.
Cleo likes to masturhate on Friday nights while listening to Depeche Mode and pouring hot candle wax on himself and his cats.
by Melrose927 April 05, 2010
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Masturhate

(v) Masturbating to imagery of a person that you cannot stand.
I masturhated to Margaret the other day.
by belial10 March 10, 2015
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Masturhate

Masturbating while fantasizing about someone you strongly dislike/detest.
by Eco-oreo10 December 13, 2009
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masturhating

The equivalent of a cock block, but when it happens during solo masturbation. Someone knocking on the door while a man is jacking off inside would be masturhating.
Jon: So what'd you do yesterday man?
Alex: I was bored as shit so I was just jacking off until my brother knocked on the door. Totally masturhating.
by Admiral_A1 July 06, 2010
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Masturhate

When you masturbate about someone who you despise. This can be done to achieve climax, or simply to confirm your hatred of someone.
Dude, I just masturhated so hard on Gwyneth Paltrow.

Why? That lady's a bitch!

Exactly!
by GayBlaine October 07, 2014
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Masturhation

Surfing a social network, and (whether intentional or no premeditation) hating on peoples' pictures. Obviously you don't post a comment, but you may tell a friend or two to check out this person, and how you think they're fake. Although it can happen with anybody, it is more common in people with ovaries.
Brit: Omg, did you see Hannah's new pictures? She's wearing A&F clothes, but she always talks about how she hates preppy clothes.

Dave: I don't care, at all. Quit with your masturhation. All you've been doing for the past 30 minutes is complaining about other girls on myspace.
by Domonic February 14, 2009
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