Skip to main content

Mastication 

Mastication is the process by which food is crushed by teeth. To chew.
Bob: Hey, can I masticate here?
Joe: Sure, I'll watch you masticate.
Bob: I love mastication, and doing it with a friend is even better
Joe: Now I want to masticate...
Mastication by YouOnKazoo22 June 29, 2018

Mastobation 

Masturbating while listening to music from the band Mastodon.
usually in correlation with the tempo of the song,guitar parts,or drums.
due to this fact,you often must change speeds and rhythm rapidly,making for a better experience.
Drew:DUDE! i just Mastobated to all of Leviathan!

Micky:No way! how big was your Iron Tusk?

Drew:Huge! it was awesome,its like i have a Hand of Stone!

-OR-

Mickey: I know just how to wake up my Sleeping Giant,ill just pop in Blood Mountain and...The Wolf is Loose!

Grandparents: Mastobation sure keeps our Hearts Alive!

so on and so forth...
Mastobation by Dandy Ritcher February 24, 2011

sado-mastication

The fixation or propensity to beat your food before or during eating it.
Sarah: Hey Marty I brought you home a cheeseburger.

Marty: Oh, I bet it’s been a VERY VERY BAD burger!

While engaging is sado-mastication, Marty proceeds to pimp slap and punch the helpless cheeseburger before taking a bite and then makes sounds of delight, achieving some sort of sick thrill from this!
sado-mastication by donkey shave January 30, 2010

manipulo-mastication 

The skill of being able to detect a foreign item in your mouth, notably when found in food, and to manipulate it with the tongue, teeth and lips to eject it alone.

Adept manipulo-masticators compete by having meals together of food that has deliberately been adulterated with hair, small stones, pieces of pith, etc. The winner is the one who has collected the most items.
"When you spit at people, it's cool to have sufficient powers of manipulo-mastication to retain your chewing gum."
manipulo-mastication by mstclair68 December 9, 2012

Mastication 

1) The act of oral sex with foodstuffs.
2) The act of chewing said foodstuffs after fornication.
Did you know that chewing food is called mastication?

That's like having oral sex with your food man, gross.
Mastication by Kiwi Baccano October 15, 2012

post mastication turbulence

After eating at a Mexican joint last night, me and my buddies got severe cases of post mastication turbulence.