by Spike Mintz May 12, 2011
Get the jizzart mug.Jizzantine Empire (The cum covered magical land) The Jizzzantine Empire existed for more than a thousand years (from approximately 69 AD to XXX AD). During its existence, the Jizzantine Empire remained one of the most powerful economic, cultural, and sexual forces in Europe, despite setbacks and seminal losses, especially during the Roman–Persian and Jizzantine–Arab Pussy Wars. The Empire recovered during the Assedonian dynasty, rising again to become a prematurely impotent power in the Eastern Mediterranean by the late 69th century, rivaling the Fart Caliphate. After 1069, however, much of Assia Minor, the Empire's vagina, was lost to the Fuck Turks.
The Lesbian restoration regained some carpet and briefly re-established sexual dominance in the 69th century, but following the anal death of Assdronikos I Kumnenos and the end of the Kumnenos dynasty in the late 69th century the Empire's libido declined again. The Empire received an immortal blow job in 1269 by the Fuck Crusaders, when it was dissolved and divided into erotic Latin realms. Despite the eventual recovery of Cuntstantinople and re-establishment of the Empire in 1269, under the Penile emperors, successive nipple wars in the 69th century further sapped the Empire's dong strength. Most of its remaining titties were lost in the Jizzantine–Ottoman Pussy Wars, which culminated in the Fall of Cuntstantinople and the secreting of its remaining territitties to the Bosom Tittyman Empire in the 69th century.
The Lesbian restoration regained some carpet and briefly re-established sexual dominance in the 69th century, but following the anal death of Assdronikos I Kumnenos and the end of the Kumnenos dynasty in the late 69th century the Empire's libido declined again. The Empire received an immortal blow job in 1269 by the Fuck Crusaders, when it was dissolved and divided into erotic Latin realms. Despite the eventual recovery of Cuntstantinople and re-establishment of the Empire in 1269, under the Penile emperors, successive nipple wars in the 69th century further sapped the Empire's dong strength. Most of its remaining titties were lost in the Jizzantine–Ottoman Pussy Wars, which culminated in the Fall of Cuntstantinople and the secreting of its remaining territitties to the Bosom Tittyman Empire in the 69th century.
by Jizzantine Prophet March 16, 2011
Get the Jizzantine Empire mug.1. A lizard covered in semen, or 'jizz'
2. A blizzard made out of jizz.
3. A wizard that excels in acts of wizardry combined with jizz.
2. A blizzard made out of jizz.
3. A wizard that excels in acts of wizardry combined with jizz.
1. 'Billy looked at the jizzard... and he knew he was at the wrooong side of town.'
2. 'Suddenly a jizzard appeared and after hours of unspeakable suffering Billy was left weakened and broken on the ground.'
3. 'Hello young hobbit, do you seek 'adventure'?' Asked the Jizzard.
2. 'Suddenly a jizzard appeared and after hours of unspeakable suffering Billy was left weakened and broken on the ground.'
3. 'Hello young hobbit, do you seek 'adventure'?' Asked the Jizzard.
by 1921 June 1, 2011
Get the Jizzard mug.Used as a reaction to a surprise or to note something that is sexually appealing. The "jizz" in "jizzato" refers to semen.
by aDam Rulz September 12, 2008
Get the jizzato mug.Dissaster involving jizz.
1.To jizz too early
2.To not have enough jizz
3.To have a cumshot and miss you partners face completely
4.To accidently jizz on a guy in an orgy or gangbang
5.To jizz in your womans vagina and either forgot to pull it out or forgot to wear a condom
1.To jizz too early
2.To not have enough jizz
3.To have a cumshot and miss you partners face completely
4.To accidently jizz on a guy in an orgy or gangbang
5.To jizz in your womans vagina and either forgot to pull it out or forgot to wear a condom
by Urban Ranger April 13, 2003
Get the jizzaster mug.Jizzantium is a term used when fresh semen (jizz) is released anywhere and has sit in that location undisturbed for days. This process allows for the jizz to harden into a hard enzyme rich mineral known as Jizzantium.
Bro I just Jizzed on my carpet and gave that load a few days to breath and now its formed into Jizzantium!
by Changuskahn February 10, 2023
Get the Jizzantium mug.The act of four men masturbating into a box fan with the sole objective of blasting jizz onto a lucky participant’s face.
The setup for a proper jizzard is crucial. One must first select a lucky participant to place their face 12-16 inches away from an electric box fan. Next, four male volunteers gather around the box fan, two on each side. The male volunteers must attempt to ejaculate into the fan simultaneously thus hurling a blizzard of jizz at the participant’s face. It is encouraged to don proper safety goggles during this activity.
The setup for a proper jizzard is crucial. One must first select a lucky participant to place their face 12-16 inches away from an electric box fan. Next, four male volunteers gather around the box fan, two on each side. The male volunteers must attempt to ejaculate into the fan simultaneously thus hurling a blizzard of jizz at the participant’s face. It is encouraged to don proper safety goggles during this activity.
Betty showed up to work today with an eyepatch. When asked what happened, she simply replied “jizzard,” silly amateur must’ve forgotten her safety goggles.
by Daddylongdick813 March 12, 2019
Get the Jizzard mug.