homepener 

The first home game of a sports teams season. A portmanteau of home and opener.

"Ticket Prices tend to be a lot higher for the homepener."

homepener by soupodope March 3, 2023

Homeowners Association 

An omnipresent force in suburbia, or at least in most of it's residential neighborhoods.

A quasi-fascist governing board, often set up by a subdivision's real-estate developer, who strictly enforce such rules and building codes as...

-Grass must be kept watered, golf course green and closely manicured, even during times of drought and water shortages

-No one uses their yard to grow their own food

-No patch of land may be permitted to return to it's natural state

-No rooms or other additions may be permitted above or in front of the existing home

-No potter's shed or tool shed may be allowed anywhere on the property

-No yard ornaments

-No rain barrels

and so on.

The homeowners association says you can't put an addition onto the front of the house. They also said you couldn't add a 2nd level (which would keep any additional property from being paved over.) They said that the only place you could add on was the back (which paradoxically is the only yard anyone ever actually uses.)

To get another idea of what a homeowner's association is like, watch the 1999 episode of the X-Files by the name of "Arcadia."

Homeowners Association by Miskatonic Jack 2 January 11, 2011

Professional Homeowner 

An unskilled, lazy individual who has been fired from numerous jobs and relegated to sitting at home fantasizing that doing household chores is a full time profession.

That wanker was fired from every job he was hired to do and is now stuck being a professional homeowner.

Professional Homeowner by rainbowking January 30, 2023

Homeowners Association 

A group of Karens.

When Karens gather in a large group, they are known as a Homeowners Association.

Homeowners Association by Brahsm42R September 10, 2020

homeowner's association 

A small group of real estate agents, builders and developers who control and repress the residents of a suburban neighborhood. The aim of the association is to maintain the profitability of the real estate business by keeping the neighborhood in a state of Disney-like visual perfection - regardless of the impact on residential life. This is accomplished by enforcing rules for landscaping, lawn and building exterior maintenance, and by outlawing simple functional items and amenities such as basketball nets, garbage cans, satellite dishes, solar panels, flower pots, compost piles, window blinds, bike trails, mailbox numbers, etc.

The homeowner's association fined me $50 because I own a garbage can.

Our homeowner's association says we can't have a bike trail, because some buyers might believe that bike trails attract crime and drug dealers.

homeowner's association by LouSara September 20, 2012

joe the homeowner 

joe the homeowner another word for a homeowner who likes to do their own repairs rather than paying a professional

to do the job

my bathroom sink started leaking yesterday with a trip to the hardware store for parts joe the homeowner got it done without paying a professional to do the job

joe the homeowner by littlejimmie March 11, 2019

homeowner's association 

Located in the USA, these "board members" and their "president" are basically the mafia and/or terrorists.

They terrorize and cause hell with their own fellow neighbors who agree to be part of their little "shit world."

They threaten them with foreclosure of your own home, they scrutinize you for the littlest things, and they are basicallly dictators.

They also have the power to fine people (for tons of $$ a day) for various things like:
*You can't put a flagpole in your yard (I'm a damn patriot! i represent the USA!).
*You can't put plastic flamingos in your lawn.
*Your fence is one inch too tall.
*You can't paint your house a different color without permission of the board.
*AND SO MUCH MORE SHIT!!!

Let's compare it to someone familiar in history!!!
Lets think of Hitler. He terrorized and dominated a whole society and murdered and slaughtered tons of Jewish people.

What did we learn today? Kick their ass!

Here's a simple headline for you: "HOMEOWNER ASSOCIATIONS FILE MORE THAN 4000 FORECLOSURES ANNUALLY - MOSTLY AGAINST HISPANICS"

Fuck, at least I live in a place where my city government makes fair policy, and not bullshit policy by assholes.

homeowner's association by Akit April 4, 2004