Hellaporting is a manifestation of the mind in that which you transfer your molecular matter into the subspace of inexistence, only to spontaneously reappear in another location.
Churro: HEY GET OVER HERE RIGHT N--
HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET OVER HERE SO FAST?!
An unreasonably long distance commute for work. Derivative of the Northern California word hella. The opposite of telecommute.
Dude: "I bought a house in Livermore but I still have to drive to The City for work every day..."
Dude's Friend: "Dude, I'd rather shoot myself than be stuck with that hellacommute!"