Noun, derived from the verb hardparking. One who has all manner of track and race modifications on his/her car, yet never goes to the track or auto-x.
"Jim's 325is with the M-tech body kit and Moton coil-overs and Turner sway bars, and that finned diff cover on the 3.23 LSD from Bob's totaled '99 M3, and the roll cage with fire supression system, and the 3.5" HFM and all his shizz under the hood is so hot right now."
"Yeah, dude, too bad he's a hardparker, if he learned how to drive that car would kill at the auto-x."
While our lifespan is the number of years we will live, our healthspan is the number of healthy years we will have and our sexspan is is the number of years we will continue to be healthy enough to continue having an active sex life.
A lighthearted reaction upon receiving disappointing news of some sort. Usually something that isn't a particularly a big deal, esp. when it primarily affects someone else - sort of a mild schadenfreude. Sometimes doubled or tripled, and possibly said in a sing-songy voice for added comedic effect to imitate a muted trumpet, which is how the meme originated.