The delivery of an intellecutally effective, usually humorous, ironic and often quite exquisite tongue lashing - coined after the exploits of Christopher Hitchens, a successful 21ist century author and political commentator.
We who have witnessed the brilliance of Hitchens' life would do society a favor by carrying on with the art of the hitchslap.
While our lifespan is the number of years we will live, our healthspan is the number of healthy years we will have and our sexspan is is the number of years we will continue to be healthy enough to continue having an active sex life.
A lighthearted reaction upon receiving disappointing news of some sort. Usually something that isn't a particularly a big deal, esp. when it primarily affects someone else - sort of a mild schadenfreude. Sometimes doubled or tripled, and possibly said in a sing-songy voice for added comedic effect to imitate a muted trumpet, which is how the meme originated.