Gluteal Spreadinitis

The spreading of the gluteus maximus in women when they out grow their teen years. When a women eats too much and her ass grows larger and larger.

My ex-wife was stricken with Gluteal Spreadinitis after eating too many Twinkies and Ho-Ho's.

by farting dumb ass March 12, 2009

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gluteal muscles

The three muscles that make up your bum

She flexed her gluteal muscles

by Frredda January 11, 2009

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A bullshit excuse for not coming in to work. or to cancel plans. "Gluteal" literally means ass, and although "glaucoma" is technically an eye disease, another definition of the word can also be: "a poor excuse". So this phrase basically translates to "my ass ain't coming to work and I don't have a good excuse".

John: "hey boss, I'm not coming to work today".

Boss: "wtf John? Why not?"

John: "I have Gluteal Glaucoma".

by dillonstrider413 March 11, 2024

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Hyper Gluteal Fascial Syndrome

Hyper Gluteal Fascial Syndrome (HGF) is a legitimate medical condition that occurs when the cleft of the buttocks extends high above the waistline. Symptoms include an exposed butt crack and public ridicule.

John has Hyper Gluteal Fascial Syndrome that is why we are forced to look at his ass everytime he bends over

by Poultry Prince April 7, 2019

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Glutealthermaphobia

The fear of or dread experienced by sitting in or just thinking about sitting in a chair or seat that has been warmed by someone else's butt cheeks.

Tom: "Bob, why are you standing up at your desk?"
Bob: "The IT guy was just here installing new software on my PC. I'm waiting for my seat to cool off."
Tom: "Dude - you've got a bad case of glutealthermaphobia!"
Bob: "Hey - maybe I just don't like sitting down in someone else's butt-sweat!"

by songwriterz December 2, 2011

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