fucktometer 

meter that effectively measures how fucked you are in a given situation

Cop: You are arrested for bringing all this cocaine across the border.

Brian: Wow this is off the fucktometer.

fucktometer by spicykal May 8, 2009

fuckometer 

A device used to assess the shagability of a chick. Ranging from zero to ten, the fuckometer gives a graded scale which dudes can use to compare tail.

Dude 1: "Your mom's a fox, dude. She's 9 on the fuckometer."
Dude 2: "WTF?!!?"

fuckometer by Wizards Sleeve July 27, 2006

funkometer 

n. The Scientific Measurement for levels of Funk. 10 Kravitz= 1 Hendrix, 25 Hendrix= 1 Hayes, 50 Hayes= 1 Fonzie. Examples: the 1970's rate 3 Fonzies, 16 Hayes on the Scale, where as Joseph Lieberman is -10,000 Fonzies.

When Stu went to the rollerdisco he used his the funkometer to rate the funkiness of the rollerdisco.

funkometer by The Penguin Incarnate October 26, 2003