emissionaries 

A common variety of uppity evangelicals who litter our globe with trash, trample the beliefs of others, feeling sorry for children with different colored skin, all the while drinking bottled water, hyperventilating over the latest features of their electronic devices, and generally acting like God's Gift to Consumerism.

Dear Lord, cried the poor foreign woman, the emissionaries are coming to vacation in our town again, please give us strength...
or
Emissionaries carry a Bible in one hand, to slap you with, and a iPhone in the other to document the Glory....

emissionaries by artfulmark July 31, 2009

Missionaries 

People from (usually) Christian faiths who go knocking door to door spreading their view on Christianity (or likewise). They most common variety are the LDS (mormons) and Jehova's Witnesses (Jay Dubs).

They can easily be identified, the LDS Missionaries always wear either suits or white shirts, ties, and slacks and always come in pairs of two, and in rare occasions three. The JW missionaries usually come in a car with at least two (sometimes a full car) and only one will knock on each door (as compared to LDS missionaries who both go to the same door at the same time). Also, LDS missionaries are usually 19-21 year old men, occasionally women of the same age, and in even rarer occasions elderly couples. The Jehova Witnesses come in nearly the full spectrum of human age.

Contrary to popular belief, not all mormon missionaries ride bikes. Some of them get cars, and some only walk.

I put a "NO SOLICITING" sign outside my door to keep those pesky missionaries off my property.

Missionaries by Kevomirr July 30, 2010

missionaries 

A group of annoying religeous fanatics who come to your door to attempt to convert you to their pathetic religeon. Usually having no respect for anybody else but their own scewed beliefs about how they can become gods, and in the case of the mormons, racism and polygamy.
-Immune to logic
-Wears a suit and tie usually
-Funded by massive religeous projects that rip money out of the poor dumb people who follow them
-Travel in groups of 2 usually
-Extremely stupid, and they often sacrifice a whole 2 years of their lives (thats 2% of your life if your optimistic).

Hello there, we have come to tell you about some great news! Fact of the matter is, you can be IMMORTAL! you can actually FLY and make black people pick cotton for you. just JOIN our religeon. DO IT NOW OR DIE! WERE A MISSIONARIES!

missionaries by mogel September 25, 2006

Mormon Missionaries 

Useless.

Mormon Missionaries are useless.

Mormon Missionaries by Torusorus December 6, 2018

Two Missionaries in a Crock-Pot 

First recorded reference in "Mike and Molly" at season 1 episode 21 at -00:08:54 as a punchline.

Currently used to describe two (2)persons coital with two (2) others in the same room and everybody hopes it gets wierd.

So, half the people were on top, did ya'll end up like two missionaries in a crock-pot?

Two Missionaries in a Crock-Pot by Dctrsqr May 18, 2023