crusty dick 

When you jerk off and let your cum drip down your dick and it quickly dries up forming a semen crust on your penisian head.

I was jerking off and right before I came I realized I had no tissues near me. I had to let the cum drip down and accept the crusty dick.

crusty dick by DopeyDick October 28, 2015

crusty dick 

The result of peanut butter masturbation. Fap off with your thickest peanut butter for a minute, and gentleman, you have a crusty dick.

I made love to my right hand using Jiffy and now I got a crusty dick.

crusty dick by Nononono May 8, 2015

Crusty dick cheese 

98% of men have dick cheese yet they don't admit it. Crusty Dick Cheese is basically when men don't practice good hygiene and the hot mixture of cum and pee bonds together and ferments for a long time until it turns into cheese. Natural and healty, its high in Glucose, salt and has low calories.

Slut1: hey b*tch you evah tried crusty dick cheese no?
Slut2: no shit, wtf is dick cheese yo...
Slut1: r u cereal? u no slut then

Crusty dick cheese by DeepThroating69 July 4, 2017

Crusty dick syndrome 

A genetic syndrome that causes your dick to become super crusty even while you age and the layers of skin build up to the point you hear a crunching noise when you fuck your wife/woman and it is incurable. It has been said that back when Christopher Columbus came to the Americas, he had this syndrome and many thought it was known as a severe STD that cause layers of skin to fall off from your dick and they used to think his semen crustified his dick, but nope he had it. If you have crusty dick syndrome, well i hope you are prepared to hear the crunch of your dick.

Steven:"dude have you ever heard? Mark has crusty dick syndrome"

Crusty dick syndrome by Gothgirlforever2000 April 24, 2019

crusty dick energy 

The vibrant and adrenaline-filled rush one experiences when confronted with a scenario of one's own crusty dick, and an escalating sexual encounter.

Under crusty-dick energy, one tends to ruthlessly skip over foreplay such as oral sex to the main act, and avoids bright lighting, to tenaciously hide the fact that your dick is crusting.

This has the paradoxical effect of appearing more confident and at times, more romantic due to the low lighting circumstances. It can lead to a win on both fronts. It can also give the illusion that you are not a man of selfishness and prefer mutual pleasure.

Cindy: I can't get over how mysterious Charles was last night....
Samantha: What do you mean?

Cindy: Usually men want blowjobs before sex, he went straight for it...it was kinda hot...
Samantha: Are you sure he didn't just have Crusty Dick Energy?

crusty dick energy by awwwshiiiet March 2, 2022

crusty dickhat 

Having a dry ass foreskin, usually cracks.

shit man i got a crusty dickhat

crusty dickhat by CrazyCoolGuy April 4, 2016

Giant Honey Anal-Attracted Pussy-Preserved Crust-Munching Dick Stroking Monster 

A monster mentioned in the 2007 best-seller, 'The Night of Unwelcome Visitors'.
This monster is combined of many people, and is some-what beautiful.
It happens to be a cross-breed of a human, and an animal, and this is what some people call 'disturbing'.

An extract from the story is shown below:
"The only way to defeat the Giant Honey Anal-Attracted Pussy-Preserved Crust-Munching Dick Stroking Monster was to play with its arse, and do a controlled extreme-supreme muscle-power-wank into it’s eyes.
Fred and Alan combined together, and did exactly that, and thus, the monster evaporated into a pile of burnt shit."

"Gerald, Dave, Joe and Jon had a massive gang bang, and all formed and absorbed into one big massive honey loaf of butter crusted anal cheese-like human/mongoose like creature, which couldn’t stop wanking, and had to ejaculate every 10 minutes.
This was now known as the Giant Honey Anal-Attracted Pussy-Preserved Crust-Munching Dick Stroking Monster."

Giant Honey Anal-Attracted Pussy-Preserved Crust-Munching Dick Stroking Monster by erectism January 11, 2008